Well Outside Vanilla!

The kiss of the crop

2011-12-16T07:13:00.001Z

The last two post were a bit spicy weren't they. Better be more fun..

We may be taking a break from 24/7 d/s but we sure aren't stopping our 12 days of Christmas. In fact ever since the whipping I posted about recently sandy has kicked up the intensity a lot!

This means that sandy has finally marked me with the crop. She's tried often but I don't bruise easy. Shes every so very happy, it's lasted two days and counting.

What a mess

2011-12-12T15:05:00.002Z

Sandy had a conversation with her lover. Long and short of it is that his feelings are so strong for her he doesnt think he can strike a balance. As such he thinks its better he ends it before our marriage is affected.

Unfortunately he has been badly hurt himself and he was having a tough time even before this. Sandy is gutted, she really did feel for the guy. I feel like a cad for precipitating the whole thing and messing things up. We needed and asked for more space but somehow that has become a damnable mess.

You would think most men would jump at a low friction fun and friendship type affair! Thats two out of two who have fallen too deeply for Sandy, asked for too much, and as such its gone awry.

How hard is an emotionally open marriage?

2011-12-11T20:43:00.001Z

A quick update

Sandy and I are taking a short break from d/s. This includes orgasm denial (though it pained her to say it) and denial of intercourse. We are also in the last make or break stage of keeping this marriage open with this lover, stopping the experiment.

When things settle I hope to write much more about it. Hopefully it will settle without us having to stop but we are a hair breadth from that decision. It is proving very tricky to manage a three way relationship. This isn't pure sex or friends with benefits. Sandy is naturally prone to immersing herself in her lover, at least for the first months and flush of excitement. He is emotionally demanding and unfortunately has fallen in love. Love is fine to a point, but he is constantly trying to get her attention and is jealous of me. she can't easily keep away from him mentally and reserve time and attention for me partly because of her own excitement, but more because of his possessiveness and constant contact. I feel he is a threat to us, I am trying to be open to sharing, he is not. As a result I was starting to feel jealous of him until realised that this is not the way it should be, that were he not so demanding of her it would be more lighthearted and fun for all, and not feel so threatening.

Sandy is stressed at work, tired, busy. She has not got the time and mental energy to deal with that, and me, and kids, and work etc. She cant see him several times a week and still have time and energy for her family, or be responding to texts in the evenings instead of being present with us.

She intends to talk to him about this tomorrow. I have my doubts he has the maturity to cope with such a complex relationship, if he doesn't it will end soon.

For my part sandy has said that she wants more freedom, is not comfortable with my being too involved. This is a learning experience for me too, and in principle I am happy, both as a husband and a sub, to set her free. I hadn't realised she felt that way. We both agree though that we need to think about how it is working first. I have taken more control since we started rather than less because I don't trust him to respect our marriage, and because she has made some serious mistakes that have hurt me. It is a learning experience for us all, and a hard lesson. She sees why I am like this. I see why she did what she did. I love her and know her, I can understand her actions and am beginning to understand her needs and drives.

We are doing some hard thinking the next few days. Much will depend on him, she and I can make it work we think, though we aren't sure, but can he?

Some more questions answered

2011-12-11T20:00:00.001Z

More questions and answers

First of all I was rather amused at Marias picking up on the odd spelling mistake. I have a very busy life. A wife who works full time and two kids, a main job, and founding another business. I write in short snatches, often on and iPhone while travelling. Rarely have time to proof read or edit much, and am reliant on spotting the inevitable iPhone autocorrect howler. So while I apologise for those mistakes I'm not going to stop making them :)

Sandy rarely reads my posts or anything online. She isn't an online person. She does on occasion though and it can happen anytime. Yes I have discussed with her about wether she would stop. She insist without hint of hesitation that she would, although admits she would find hard. If she ever told me she wouldn't a red flag would go up so fast you wouldn't believe. I'm not a beta character in life, quite the opposite. I am her sub because we respect each other and i love and trust her, but I'm no doormat. If her love for me ever became threatened the d/s would stop from my side very quickly. So would her extramarital fun, or our marriage.

Luckily she has no intention of threatening one of the happiest marriages of anyone we know :)

Paul Pines is an interesting case. I read some of his diary a long while ago and found it a very sad read. It isnt relevant to us though. I am good in bed, I turn sandy on a lot, and if I didn't my self respect would first drive me to learn to be better, and if that failed I would with regret have to move on to someone with whom I was more compatible. kids of course make that more complicated but it's the timing that might be affected, not the outcome. Again luckily that's not who she or I are in any way.

Sandy doesn't prefer sex with her lover, she likes both. Right now I have an edge because I know her better, and he has an edge because he is new and exciting. That makes us different but doesn't make her prefer him. She actively enjoys denying me because it turns her on not because she doesn't enjoy fucking me. That said I can't say for sure that it won't increase in time. In fact I think there is a high chance it will. But it will do so only as long as we both enjoy it, if I stop enjoying it then she won't either. That's what she is like. What any loving couple are like in my opinion. Further we both get bored easily and need variety, so we will likely always take breaks from it if only for a change. Finally there is a certain intimacy that we both get from making love, her less so than me but still enough that while she can do without for long periods, it wouldn't be forever.

I hope this clarifies some. If I'm coming on strong it's because I know her, me and us well, and nothing resembling the Paul Pines level of discomfort would enter into this relationship before one or both of us backtracked screaming :)

Sandys favourite words are it's fun. If it isn't fun, if it gets uncomfortable or boring then things change.

The twelve days of Christmas

2011-12-05T10:10:00.001Z

Fours years ago on the 1st december something began that, though we had no idea at the time, would lead to my wife recognising her dominance and becoming comfortable with it. Which in turn would lead to us living a mostly continuous domme /sub relationship. Though we do take breaks on occasion, for a change or when we are feeling the need for vanilla, even during the break there is a tiny undercurrent of d/s.

This wasn't always the case. I'm very alpha in normal life and like to be in control always. That's how sandy and I used to be, and she for her part used to think she liked to mould herself to others.

I knew i was a switch sexually but never really explored emotional or day to say submission. Sandy knew she liked to dominate sexually on occasion but was never comfortable in the role or aware she actually liked to be in control. She mostly did it because I liked it.

The thing that triggered the change was the twelve days of Christmas. It started as a kinky game. On December 1st she would whip me once. Twice on the second. Etc. It sounded fun to us both. On the first day she realised that one wasn't enough and decided the count was per bum cheek.

And so it began. By the 25th she was very much more comfortable with being in the dominant role and we had both started to recognise that she felt fulfilled in the wider role of domme, not just as the odd sex game.

This Christmas we thought we would do the same. Only now she has a riding crop, a real one for horses not for men's bottoms. It hurts. I'm very much enjoying having 24 days of submitting to her and she loves the idea of whipping me anyway so relishes it too! Probably more than me.

I'm wondering how I'm going to cope with 24!!!

I know I will thank her from the bottom of my heart. I always feel especially in love when I submit to her, and she enjoys an intimacy with me that she truly appreciates.

I'm scared

2011-12-04T00:17:00.001Z

It's all happening fast. It's happening to extremes. For me at least. Deepest and darkest fantasies are becoming likely to happen. I feel like things I have fantasised about for a long time are not my fantasy any more but Sandy's. And she wants them to be real.

It's one thing sharing your wife. It's another lying in bed desperate horny, truly wishing you could cum. Truly wishing you could fuck her. Make love to her. Yet have her say no. Have her tell you, in total seriousness and candour, that she does not miss fucking you and does not intend to allow you to do that. Not words said purely to fuel a fantasy but stated even when cold. Thats not sharing, that's being as deeply submissive as a man can get. That's allowing what I so desire to be taken by her from me. And sandy, well she gets off more and more on the disparity. He gets to cum, I don't. On her tits, in her mouth, in her pussy or ass. Wherever and however he wants. She loves that I can't do that. She revels in it. It makes her feel powerful and mean and delicious, her eyes burn with fire as she says how much she likes it. She enjoys being his slut, and all the more because she is my Domme and my denier.

Tonight I asked her to tell me a dark fantasy she likes. She told me locking my cock up for a whole month, no freedom at all. To be fucking her lover, maybe even three times a week, taking photos to show me, taunt me with, knowing I won't have a single orgasm, or a single minute of freedom from the chastity belt merely to have a wank over the photo of her unfaithfulness. I was floored by the extreme of the fantasy, but not as floored as when I asked her if she wanted it for real. Her answer an unequivocal yes! Even pointing out that if he figured out how to make her cum properly even that pleasure might be reduced for me. I would get to tease her but not often make her cum.

Sandy and I have a few issues to deal with at the moment. Some related to making an open marriage work in reality, some related to life in general. I will write about them. She pointed out that she would be worried about making that fantasy real just now because of those other things, but If they were sorted then she would do it.

Furthermore she wants to reduce my weekly single orgasm to one a month. I suggested a day of freedom a month but she insists one sole orgasm only. She wants that because it's mean and fun and makes her squirm, and because her lover will get even more than me then. She thinks she could keep that up for maybe 6 months! Again these other issues mean for now it will remain fantasy, but maybe not forever. This tid bit came up when I asked, no begged her to allow me two orgasms a week as I'm really struggling with being horny all the time. Two orgasms a week was just laughed at, no chance at all. That's when she mentioned her interest in one a month.

Be careful what you wish for has never felt this true. She is running ahead with things I never imagined could be real. My limits are being pushed hard. I am honestly truly mixed up about wether I can do this. My cock loves it, my sexuality sings to her tune. My heart is afraid and my alpha male head is rebelling. My old Domme used to say I think too much, just live in the moment and enjoy. Sandy is now telling me the same. It's just fun she says. But her fun is easier to live with, my end of this Faustian deal is a bittersweet pleasure.

Angst much?

I know he isn't a better lover than me, though he is very good. He is new and of course that is a huge turn on for her. She doesn't prefer fucking him, in the sense of prefer the sensation or way he does it, but for now she prefers to fuck only him and deny me because that is her pleasure. I know she doesn't intent this way of life to be permanent, might only be weeks before she fucks me again. But I already miss making love to her, and by going this deeply into submission to her I wonder if we could ever truly go back. No I know we couldn't. Already 4 years of being her sub have changed us. Once in a blue moon could I just take what i want from her. She does not want to live that way in her main relationship. She wants the control and has tasted it. That sexual path is probably forever behind us now. How much else will change with me sliding deeper and accepting what might be weeks or months of denial of her pussy, and months of her enjoying the sexual pleasure that comes of a man who uses her and fucks her and does what he likes. Afterwards perhaps she will want more of that with me. But equally perhaps she will find she prefers keeping me deep in submission and getting that side of things from another man. Who knows? But I know things won't just go back to normal.

I can almost hear my old Domme saying stop overanalysing. Just enjoy it. Easier said than done!

I know i can stop this anytime. Submission is given and I could stop merely by saying this isn't working for me. Problem is I don't know if it is or isn't. I just know its extreme, scary, more than I ever expected would happen in reality.

Emma and Scott if you are reading this (i don't know if you do read my blog) I would certainly appreciate your thoughts.

M

What about love?

2011-12-01T16:57:00.001Z

Maria asked

do you assume that sandy is really still loving you ?
is the relation with her lover just based on sex or is there also an strong emotional relation ?

Good questions so i thought I would post. I know sandy is still loving me. That is not in question in my mind or my heart.

The relationship with her lover is much more than sex. She likes him, enjoys his company, and even loves him, to a point. When she gets back to me though her love for me is obvious. She enjoys the sex, its new, exciting, fresh. There is no baggage no practical consideration, no putting kids to bed or what's for dinner. In other words it is a love affair like that when you are young and carefree. It's fun, and the love and friendship is real, to a point. But only in this fantasy world, this microcosm of pretence where the real world does not intrude.

Would she be with him if he were single? Maybe but some good reasons not. She has grown together with me over the years, we have worked hard to fall deeply in love. She has in me her deep love, her soulmate, her best friend. And quite honestly I still rock her boat sexually. I'm confident and good in bed so it's not like she has her other man due to a lack on that side. He is a nice guy but in many ways not compatible with her in the real world. It's a love, friendship and sexual affair in a fantasy world without many complications. There it will stay.

He has fallen for her a bit too much. Something I need to write about soon. We are finding our feet with how this is working and it's not been without mistakes. She has begun to make it clear to him what the boundaries are. 'love me by all means, but don't try to compete with my husband. You will lose. Keep it light hearted and fun.'

Amen to that. He was starting to compete, it was starting to make it hard work and less fun, and I have no doubt he would be out in no time at all if it came to it. I only have to say the word, or him try and make her choose between us for that to happen. I'm not competing back, that would imply he has some chance. I would just withdraw the invite into our life. If sandy didn't do it first.

So yes to emotions, even to love. But as sandy says, I can love two men without it diminishing my love for my prime partner. And as she also said, not many women are lucky enough to have the chance to love two men, that should be treated with the respect it deserves.

There is some angst as I adjust. But then the way we are playing, the denial is part of that. I must write about it more.

This is not a simple relationship, poly isn't easy. Even this 'poly light' of ours. While so far the rewards are great in no way is it a simple thing to embark on. We have more work to do! But it makes sandy happy and that makes me happy.

And horny!

Can't sleep

2011-11-29T02:15:00.001Z

Heart churning cock burning stomach roiling. My sandy has been closeted for the last four hours with her lover and I can't get to sleep for imagining what they are up to.

She did send me a picture of her lover balls deep inside her an hour ago. A short few texts passed between us in which I said I wanted it too. She replied

'No not now not for a while...x' and then 'for him not for you x'

Her last text when asked if i was allowed to cum, read, 'No, now go to sleep I'm busy xx'

As if I can!!

On polyamory

2011-11-20T10:03:00.002Z

There is a lot of well written information about polyamory on the Internet, what I know would probably fit on the back of a postcard, or even a stamp (remember those things that used to make old fashioned paper emails go). What I do know is that this is now the third time sandy and I have started on what can only be described as the beginnings of a poly relationship.

Sandy, who for years has had permission to play but always said she didn't want to, has for the second time found a lover, once last year and now. Several years ago she and I had a semi regular threesome with a man who is still a good friend. In his case he was almost becoming part of the family, I could have imagined him in our lives longer term and so could sandy. She called it off in part because she could grow to like him too much. The lover last year (initially at least) and her current lover occupy a similar position in her mind. Not simply friends, not only sex. She admits that she likes this guy, cares for him, loves sex with him and in some way loves him (or at least that pale shadow of love that exists in the first months of a relationship). She knows he is not threat to us, if anything she loves me even more right now. She has realised with these three experiences that she has it in her to care for more than one man without it threatening her feelings for her prime relationship. With that realisation she finds it much easier, and much more fun, to let herself go with this lover.

So we find ourselves in the unexpected position of being in the beginnings of what could become a poly. Sandy and I, with sandy having a secondary but emotionally valuable relationship as well.

I am still amazed, happy, grateful, and proud to see how she has developed from the very shy wallflower of her youth to the remarkable, confident, passionate woman she is today, and if you knew what she was like when she was young you would never have believed she could become this person. I have to pinch myself to check I'm not imagining it. With each year that passes she grows in confidence and in willingness to make the most of life. Polyamory suits her, I suspected so last year but as it turned out the guy was not a good match, I'm even more sure now. Sandy, who hates being labelled and isn't always comfortable admitting in the cold light of day what she likes, did not bat an eyelid when I suggested she had the capacity for this kind of relationship, she's admitted it to herself. Again that's unusual for her given how she still struggles sometimes with what 'society' deems acceptable. .

I did say she is capricious!

2011-11-19T18:02:00.001Z

That decision to deny me her mouth didn't last long! Heheh.

Sandy just gave me a full on, deep in her mouth, tongue on my frenum, balls being needed, finger in my ass, kneeling and looking up at me with her pretty blue eyes, cum in her mouth orgasm. My head almost exploded.

I've been cleaning up and tidying all sorts today, and apparently that and the fact that she loves me, on the spur of the moment as I got out of the shower she decided to look after me.

I'm very chilled now!

My Domme as I saw her

2011-11-19T14:48:00.001Z

This is what he gets to enjoy, and I am denied. As I saw her just before leaving for work.

Screaming orgasm

2011-11-19T14:33:00.000Z

That’s what I want, what I need. Im craving it somethingcrazy. I want to slide inside my wife, her hot wetness enveloping my cock,squeezing me, feeling her body brushing against mine, her breasts against mychest. I need to fuck her so badly, cum inside her and feel her cum aroundme.

Its not to be. In fact I texted her yesterday sayingsomething like the above. Her response… ‘No! Not a chance!’

Its what she and he get.

This time last year sandy found a lover, though that didn’tend too well. Didn’t think we would be here again but she has found another. Tosay he turns her on is putting it mildy. She is almost continuously damp,several times a day a text from him will turn her on, or an interaction betweensandy and I, usually in some way related to the lover, will do the same. We arehaving sex several times a week. Well sex of sorts.

Since she first started playing with him she and I had beenfantasising about what it would be like. She suggested that my orgasms shouldbe contingent on him, so my single weekly orgasm would only occur if she hadmade him cum that week. In person, phone sex doesn’t count. Hot fantasy, it wasa fun night that night, but I later realised she was totally serious. My cockis burning, aching for release, but I know that I will only cum less often thanher lover now. Its making me ache and bury myself deep in submission to her.That’s only the start.

Since she first fucked him I have been banned from beinginside her pussy. She has reserved it for her lover. For now and the indefinitefuture her pussy belongs solely to him.

Since she first sucked him she has not sucked me. She keepstelling me how much she enjoyed going down on him, how he expected it, how itmade her wet feeling his hot cock hard in her mouth. For now she refuses totake my cock in her mouth, in fact the relish, the delicious and wicked look inher eyes when she refuses, and the almost instant wetness in her panties whenshe refuses me is driving me crazy.

For now at least my orgasms are limited by him, only he getsto fuck her, to be sucked by her. Every time I look at her naked body I seesomething I lust after, something I used to be able to just take, before shebecame dominant. Now I see this most beautiful sexy woman who for years hasbeen my domme, has allowed sex only on her terms and usually for her pleasure,offer to him her body, her pussy, and let him take and use her like a toy. Hehas now fucked her several times, gone down on her for hours, and used herhowever he wanted. Her mouth has been on his cock more in the last two weeksthan it has on mine in the last year. He has told her to dress up for him whichshe has done with delight. Her vanilla and slightly submissive side has comeout to play, but only with him. The more she enjoys that side of herself withhim, the more she is getting off on denying me. Her excitement is being greatlyincreased by dwelling on how everything she willingly offers him, everything Iso crave, she denies. Each time I beg to be inside her her obvious lust insaying no makes me understand, in no uncertain terms, that I am her sub andthat she loves to be mean to me, it turns her on. My place is to be abused andteased, his to enjoy her charms. Needless to say I have made her cum a lotrecently.

Until now. For now even that has been denied me. They areplanning to get together on Monday, so for almost the last week she has notcum, saving it for him, wanting to be truly horny when he takes her. I havebeen banned from making her cum, or seeing her cum, although I get to pleasureher often. After Monday who knows, but she has discussed continuing it (as longas our intimacy is not affected). If the time between seeing him is too longshe may masturbate, perhaps with him on the phone. I will not be allowed to seethat. While I was teasing her a few nights ago she even said how it would feelif after a few months she sent me a video of her cumming with him, the firsttime I would have been allowed to see her cum for months. She was dripping wetwhen she was saying this, grinding her pussy into my hand.

---

Does this sound extreme? Damn right it is, it’s a rollercoaster. We are so much in love its unreal, and both having a lot of fun. I amcrazy horny, its almost impossible to bear, and she feeds off that. How longwill the denial last? Well the single orgasm a week has always been her rulewhile we are in d/s mode, that could be years. The rest? The lack of pussy couldeasily last for the entire time she sees him, although once in a while she saysshe may fuck me. The blow job, and especially the lack of making her cum… Thatwill probably be much shorter, as she says she is the boss and doesn’t like toget tied down in any way, including her own rules. She will do it until shefeels like not doing it. Im guessing a week or two, perhaps up to a month ortwo. Who knows. Sandyis nothing if not capricious and she may decide to fuck me senseless this sideof Christmas, but the odds are massively against it. In her words, its up toher, she is the boss, and as long as our intimacy does not suffer she will dowhat she likes for as long or short as she wants.

As she pointed out when I discussed intimacy with her, rightnow this game is doing the opposite, bringing us together.

----

One last thing. She owed me a blow job from a couple ofmonths back, for some reason or another. She has decided that debt has beenpaid now, to her lover!

I know you are out there

2011-11-18T19:05:00.001Z

So I'm going to be shameless and say, show yourselves. In return I might put up a picture of sandy as she looked when I left the house.

*Grin*

M

And so it begins

2011-11-16T21:08:00.001Z

Last night Sandy was teasing me, rubbing my cock, telling me, in a very husky turned on voice, how much sex she is getting, and im not!

This morning we woke up, had a long hug in each others arms and a bit of a tease, for both of us. Lovely way to start the day.. Then...

OMG! She got up and as she started to get washed ordered me to get things ready. Ive just put fresh sheets on the bed, shaved her pussy smooth, laced her into her waspie and left the house ready for her lover to come and join her. I was told to lick her pussy and her ass to check they were smooth enough. They were, perfectly. They also tasted great, aroused and arousing. Before I left she made me kneel down, locked up my cock and as I knelt she told me she loves me on my knees. Her tone said she loves it a lot. Made my heart skip a beat!

Im a bit horny now...

It's the little things

2011-11-15T09:37:00.001Z

Being told by your wife to change the sheets in the morning so she can spend the day with her lover in a clean bed.

Thumpers December.

2011-11-13T20:33:00.001Z

Or what happens to a subby bunny when freedom calls.

Sandy and I have taken a break from d/s for about a month and a half. This is after several months of my being her sub and orgasm restriction, in fact several years of it, with the odd break. Sandy and I have found that the odd break does us good, doing the same thing constantly takes the edge off it for us, makes it less exciting.

However my submission, her dominance, this has become a major foundation of our relationship. Orgasm denial is a feature of that. The first few weeks of the break was good, I came lots, we were vanilla together and made love the old fashioned way, and due to the pressure she was under at work we had less sex, but that was less of an issue as I did not need her to release my tension. I masturbated. This worked very well, for a while.

However after a few weeks, a month or so, this started to translate into a distance between us. I felt unnoticed, less appreciated, I wasn't getting the emotional connection I needed. Sandy also grew a bit distant, without my need binding us it was easy for us both to be tired, be lazy, eat and sleep and exist without connection. She stopped being dominant but forgot how much she enjoys it, I looked after her bit less.

We have started this aspect of our relationship again, and it's a great thing. I feel happy and fulfilled again, close to her, loved. She feels cared for, looked after. We are both enjoying the fun aspect of kink and dominance, we had forgotten how much we enjoyed it, and of course absence makes the heart grow fonder. The break was worthwhile, if perhaps a week or two too long. But there were changes, and eventually intimacy was reduced.. It's a good time to start again!

Birthday bonanza

2011-11-12T19:59:00.001Z

It was my birthday not too long ago, I just turned 20! Only the odd grey hair putting the lie to that.

The night of my birthday sandy and I had sex, it was what I had asked for as a gift and she was happy to oblige. She's been rehearsing and on stage for the last month or so, so i haven't seen much of her nor had a great deal of adult time. It was what we both needed. The details are fuzzy now, but it was a hard, fast fuck. She was turned on, I was turned on, we both had not cum in over a week. Well I had by my own hand but that doesn't count, it just doesnt hit the spot.

To get to the point, we played, got turned on, I was playing with her ass and she got so into it that I ended up with my cock sliding deep in her ass, she was sitting on my lap, her ass impaled, me thrusting up into her. Her fingers were on her clit and mine on her breasts and waist as she came hard, and I came hard filling her with my cum. A good hard filthy ass fuck, the best birthday gift.

A couple weeks or so later we were playing again. Remember that at this stage we had been taking a break from our d/s lifestyle for over a month. Partly just for a change and partly lack of time. Vanilla playtime and some hot fantasies about her with another guy led to a long hard fuck. Long and hard like those first few months together, when it was all new and exciting. Since I've had a month off and been masturbating lots holding back was no issue. I do recall having her legs in the air then over my shoulders, her bare pussy deep and hot and very wet as I slid in and out. so wet in fact it was making delicious sloppy sounds as I slammed in, and even better sounds while we slowed down and just squirmed. She was moaning the most sexy moans We did eventually cum, first her, then a few minutes later me. She had another again soon after, my cum adding to her lubrication as I slid my fingers over her clit for a second lovely orgasm.

That was the last time I was inside her, I suspect it will be my last fuck for a long time. Because that's when the lover came on the scene....

Tonight and tomorrow

2011-11-11T00:36:00.001Z

So much to say, to write. So little time. Sometimes though immediacy is paramount.

I am lying in bed but sleep eludes me. Tomorrow, while I'm at work, my wife will be fucking her new lover in our marital bed.

An unexpected adventure

2011-11-04T08:16:00.001Z

Hokay, where do i begin? Sandy looked fantastic. We parked up in London, the party was in one of the huge old victorian houses, all chandeliers and velvet opulence. As we walked up towards it I clocked a rather beautiful woman and her husband walking down the road. Something about them made me think, ' hmmm I bet they could be guests'. Then they noticed us and I became certain as they looked at us with exactly the same thought written across their faces. Once inside I can honestly say sandy and I were crapping ourselves. Weve been to so many fetish clubs, but walking into a drawing room, dressed up in cocktail dress, knowing it's a place that you are expected to meet people and then get naked and have sex.... Odd! At a fetish club you start off half naked, somehow having to get undressed from normal clothes makes it naughtier and scarier.

Anyway got chatting to a few couples after a glass or two of champagne. Found that one or two couples had been before, old hands. The rest were all new to it and crapping themselves too which made it much easier :) after a while I spotted the couple we had seen outside, haha. I caught her eye by chance and gave her a wink. Very sexy woman! Beautiful elegant shortish dress with open back and shoulders, blond hair, beautiful face. Very slim! Got chatting to them a bit later and turned out we got on really well too.

At some point we went upstairs to the play area, basically a huge room with a massive bed in the middle. Sandy and I played a bit together at the side but the sheer number of bodies in the bed was a little off-putting. The couple also disappeared it turned out for the same reason. We ended up back in the bar and they turned up, so we we sat on the sofa chatting. It was very apparent to sandy that the woman liked me, I'm a bit of a dunce though so took me longer to clock it. I was only sure when she mentioned about her liking Greek men. Given how I look I figured I was in with a chance, lol. And indeed I did, before long I was kissing her, a very passionate and good kisser she was too, and she basically writhed around on my lap being very huggy and intimate. In fact she was a remarkably huggy woman and seemed happy never to stop kissing. I love kissing! Its probably the best bit!

After a few minutes I looked up to see if sandy was ok with what was going on, she had been chatting to the husband. They weren't there! I realised they had gone back upstairs together, lol. The tart. Blondie and I stayed downstairs playing, kissing, she gave me a lovely blow job, and I made her cum. Very squirmy and fun and easygoing, all sat on a sofa in a bar, in front of the bar staff and other drinkers. Kinda very naughty! Chatted lots too. Turned out while upstairs hubby was going down sandy and making her cum, and at one point a rather attractive blond curled up kissing my wife, her breasts pressed against her chest, her boyfriend, black and handsome, close by and just touching. I missed seeing that! Apparently she liked kissing a girl.

We played upstairs again later, this time I watched him pleasuring her, she was lying on her back arching, breasts jutting (well they are silicon enhanced, they always jutt, heheh) i was playing, teasing, pinning his wife down and edging her. She claimed not to like being teased so of course I kept teasing and backing off just as she was about to cum. By the time I tipped her over she came so hard she was crying out loud and long, a very tasty sound! She tasted delicious too! I could have stayed down all night :)

Basically we had a fantastic time. Was a cool venue with lots of attractive people there. As you'd expect I loved it, but unexpectedly sandy enjoyed it too she has never been into the idea of swinging before. She even liked the idea of me fucking another woman. We will go again.

Meantime we are taking a temporary break from d/s. Just for a change.

M

So much to talk about!

2011-11-02T15:26:00.001Z

So little time to write!

More coming faithful reader. Yes you.

At peace

2011-10-28T07:45:00.001+01:00

Freya wrote a beautiful post about names, one in which their love comes across very brightly. In passing mentioned how she sleeps with her husband. It was something I could have written almost word for word!

On those nights when I can't sleep and my mind won't stop. Then I curl up with sandy, press myself in, her ass against my groin, my arm resting between her breasts, my face against her shoulder breathing the scent of her skin... and my mind and body finally relax, breathing slows, mind stops buzzing.

Funnily enough my daughter is the same. She can be buzzing and unable to sleep for hours, but if one of us curls up with her and hugs her, within minutes her breathing has slowed and she is fast asleep. Of course mummy and daddy love that too :) That time spent just relaxing and hugging my child, feeling needed, sensing her heartbeat and breathing against my chest, smelling her hair and feeling her still little arms around me makes me happy and at peace. All is well in our little world.

Forever

2011-10-24T22:45:00.001+01:00

My eyes have dulled,
The last to fade.
Faint shadow of my youth has fled.

With skin now gray.
Like drying sand
Lay ripples on my face instead.

And yet the battle rages still,
A vain hope true, and humble;
To rise, and yes to taste of life unaided.

A note from my wife

2011-10-03T19:17:00.001+01:00

Sandy, looking very pleased with herself, has coined a new phrase. She has now written it up and pinned it to our fridge.

Having a hard time

2011-10-01T09:45:00.001+01:00

I'm not feeling the submission this week. Not entirely. I have flashes of being warm and cocooned in it, but mostly my controlling side is chafing. I want to fuck sandy something rotten, but she won't allow it. I want to order her to make me coffee and massage my feet. To suck my cock while I relax. Of course sandy isn't ever going to accept that. A switch she isn't!

I'm sure it will pass. Im also sure that work isn't helping. A lot is going on and my in control persona is always switched on, watching, designing, playing politics. It's hard to switch when i get home. I love my position at work, I like to lead and I'm good at it. It can bleed over.

Still sandy is as dominant as ever, I'm sure she will remain in charge, it's best for us.

I'm free as a bird

2011-09-27T22:09:00.001+01:00

So what next?

A second week had passed and I was unlocked for the weekend, after the munch. As it turned out sandy and I had some very passionate sex on Sunday night. I don't recall specifics but I do remember it was kinky, hot, and my orgasm was spectacular!

What came next was a surprise. Sandy decided that she wanted me to cum every day for the next week. Exactly one orgasm a day, to be done at work by myself. I.e. Not much fun orgasms. Why? She said she thought it was mean to make me do it without her, and she loved the power of being able to control so personal a thing about me.

And that is what I did. One orgasm a day, every day, except one where I was too busy. The next day I had two. Sandy and I also had sex, but of course I wasn't allowed to cum then. In fact sandy loved knowing I had had 'my fun' and she could just enjoy herself. Not that that stops her normally.

It was a fun week and I certainly enjoyed my extra orgasms! I'm missing them now I'm back on the once a week schedule...

The one true way

2011-09-23T15:54:00.001+01:00

There are those on the Internet who espouse their own one true way. Who believe they are correct and brook no conversation about it. Most of those people are fools and as such can be discounted.

Once in a while you find someone who is not a fool. Someone intelligent. Someone who many consider to be a leading resource in their field. I don't intend to name names, but for the second time I find myself disappointed by a particular one of those individuals. Someone intelligent who is closed to other people's thoughts, and closed to evaluating their own opinion in the light of discourse, is in my opinion worse than the fool who doesn't know better.

I will not engage this person a third time. I've worked with their like before and know it is pointless.

I leave you with this snippet, a childish resolution to very short conversation. I quote..

'No it's not. End of conversation.'

What does she really think?

2011-09-18T19:57:00.001+01:00

The lovely Mistress Millicent wrote these words which I thought Sandy might enjoy reading. I confess I edited them slightly (I hope Mistress Millicent doesn't mind) to speak better to her, gentle them a little. My edit is below.

---------

You have proven to be a loyal husband and I love you. That doesn't mean that I must care.

I don't care if you don't want to play this game anymore.

I don't care about what you think our marital vows meant.

I don't care how jealous it makes you feel.

I don't care if you are humiliated.

I don't care about your desire to fuck me.

I don't care if you need to cum.

I will strip you naked.

I will leave the cage on your cock.

I will place you on your knees.

I will lash your body to the pillar in my bedroom.

I will insist that you watch and listen as I fuck another.

I will force you to experience my orgasm at the hands of someone else.

I will look upon you with amusement as you lick his cum from my body.

I will laugh as you clean his cock with your mouth.

I don't care what you may think about it.

Your desires are not my concern.

That is the essence of Mistress and slave.

-----------

I sent this to sandy, mostly for interest. I often send her tidbits she might enjoy. This was her response...

"She's v dominant - not caring enough in the way it's expressed but I guess I share the same sentiments!!"

Was I still locked?

2011-09-18T19:12:00.002+01:00

Locked husband asked if I was still locked while at the munch being a Dom. The answer is no.

On Thursday morning i asked for a break for a day or two, the area around the tube was getting a tiny bit bruised and sore. It's a lucky thing I did! I went out for a drink with friends. A late and drunken affair. one of the guys there suspects I have a pa and has been itching to find out the truth. While taking a pee he actually looked over, craning his whole body to see my cock and find out if I do or not. Made me laugh, especially since, due to the angle, he didn't see the ring and told me now he knew I didn't. Of course I spent the evening messing with him and telling him he should have looked from underneath, so now he is back to square one, not knowing. Haha.

But... Imagine if I'd been tubed when he looked! I can hide it from a casual glance at a urinal, but not a determined look. Phew!

Anyway Friday I was still unlocked for the soreness reason, so I could be fully Dom mentally. Ive been unlocked most of the weekend too, except Saturday daytime when sandy was away and didn't trust me on my own.. I checked to see if she had hidden the keys since it was only for the day, she laughed when she heard what I did and told me of course she had. She also told me it's what makes me feel loved, knowing she cares enough to keep me denied and safe.

how true!

Confusing

2011-09-17T00:07:00.001+01:00

I'm hoping it's not too confusing for you out there. It can be for me, heheh.

Tonight i went to a Munch with friends, I've been on and off for a year. I was there with two female friends one of whom subs to me sometimes. Good fun! So today I've kissed three beautiful women, if you include my wife, and had a very fun sparkly eyed girl with her head thrown back, her throat tightly in my fist, and her mouth mine to kiss. The testosterone is still burning in my veins.

Be careful what you wish for

2011-09-14T20:34:00.001+01:00

Last time I posted I talked about a damn good pegging and a big dose of humiliation. I also mentioned that I was not unlocked from the chastity belt at all that weekend. Well midweek I've been pleasuring my sandy, but since I only get to cum at weekends I hadn't expected anything in return. Normally however I do get one orgasm each weekend, Its what she prefers. Weekend before last she didn't unlock me and after all the pegging, all the humiliation and lust I was left unsatisfied for the week. This weekend she still had a cold so on Sunday night she demanded a 'comfort orgasm', our code for a nice relaxing no frills orgasm. What I totally didn't expect was for her to snuggle in bed, make no attempt to unlock me, have a couple of nice orgasms, then tell me she was going to sleep and I was going to be left for another week. I was stunned and begged, honestly, for a quick cum, I was desperate by then. She told me in no uncertain terms that i wasn't going to get one, and that in fact she had decided not to before we even got in bed. Though she only told me after her fun of course! I was banned from asking any more.

That's three weekends missed now, and both latter weekends locked up the entire weekend. Not even out for a tease. Basically she is enjoying my locked state, and the fact that she has no need to worry about unlocking me for comfort reasons, that leads to her settling into being happy leaving me chastised all the time. Why worry, it's just not even a factor in her mind. She did admit that after leaving me horny for a third weekend she did feel a little bad, but not much. Not enough to change her mind. I'm wondering if she will even let me cum this weekend, I really hope she does.

In total it's three weeks since my last, accidental cum, more or less a wet dream. 5 weeks since the last proper orgasm, one she gave me in the middle of our vacation. Aaaahhhh! Be careful indeed.

I find that a comfortable chastity device is a very different thing to what we have had before. Because I don't need to be unlocked, even for cleaning, it become easy for sandy to leave me much longer than she expected. It becomes a routine, the norm is locked, it's a hassle to unlock, there is no need, she likes denying me, she gets to cum and enjoy herself. My cock and orgasm has become a non-issue. Why bother? Unlocking is simply not on her mind. I'm sure she will change at some point, she likes a change now and then. But in the meantime she is happy just teasing me in the device and getting her own pleasure. Its a roll, if you get what I mean.

For me It's simultaneously intense, lustful, horny, and very submissive. Unexpectedly though its also easier than denial without the device. I sleep better, my cock is out of reach so I don't play and keep myself half awake in the night. Its very comfortable and doesn't wake me, my horniness does though, some mornings. Usually around 4-5. Without the cage I would normally play until it's time to get up, with being locked up it's pointless. I can't get a good wank so I don't bother. I get back to sleep instead. It helps. All in all my mind doesn't fight it, the decision isn't mine anymore. I can have a little play if my happiness demands it, but it's much less often, less satisfying, therefore less of an attraction. It's not easy I'm still very needy, but it's much easier than unlocked. Apart from the slight stress on the piercing I feel I could just go on.

I daydream often about slipping into her hot, wet pussy. I want it in the worst way. All sandy does is laugh and tell me that she doesn't need it, that she is perfectly satisfied thank you, with a very sexy smirk.

Roll on the weekend. I'm still hopeful.

M

A very naughty night

2011-09-05T22:47:00.000+01:00

Excuse the rushed writing, I’ve been working till 9:30 so time is limited, but wanted to get this written down before life gets in the way.

Last night my wife was in full on humiliation mood. Earlier in the day she had made me put on her panties, pink frilly ones, with the intention I would wear them all day. However after my shower mid afternoon she decided she wanted me to look manly and sexy so suggested I leave them off. I should have known the respite was temporary. The last week or so she has been talking naughty quite often, regularly referring to fucking my ass. I was pretty sure it was something she was craving.

I was also given 10 punishment strokes of the riding crop for my unauthorised cum last week. And believe me she was hard with it, no warm up. Ouch! I really do see these as punishments; I don’t ever risk getting them when warned.

She has a bit of a cold at the moment, when we got to bed she wondered if she just wanted a quick ‘comfort orgasm’ and then sleep. At this point she had already pinched my nipples a few times, and tickled me. She was threatening not to unlock me and let me cum (this is Sunday night remember), even though on Saturday night she had spent a good 20 minutes hurting me and teasing me without unlocking. Seeing all this I was pretty sure she wasn’t really going to want merely a quick orgasm. I was right, scant moments after I asked her is she no longer wanted to use the strap on she told me, urgently, to go and get it and not waste time.

Around this time she started asking me questions about what I was thinking and what was turning me on. Again like Saturday night, she was enjoying getting under my skin, and like the other night she was pushing at the things that she knew I find humiliating. She suggested she fuck my ass in the pink frilly panties, pulling them to one side, making me hand wash them afterwards. I was embarrassed but she forced me to admit that it turned me on. I joked about her throwing stockings in as well, next thing she was pushing on that, asking if I like the idea, forcing me to admit that while I would find it horribly embarrassing it would turn me on, the humiliation and her wielding the power and forcing me to do it.

So basically I ended up being ordered to put on her used stockings, the pink panties, and bend over the end of the bed. Shortly after sucking the rubber cock she was slowly but forcefully sliding it into my ass. What followed was a long and hard fuck, my face pushed down against the bed some of the time, or me arching back to meet her thrusts and feel her breast brushing my back. She was talking dirty to me, telling me what a slut I am, how dirty it is her fucking her husbands ass while his cock is locked up and he is horny. She was really kinking on the naughty, illicit, and powerful feelings over it. As she fucked me she told me that when she had had enough she was going to pull out, lie back and make me give her some nice orgasms, then she was going to sleep. I wasn’t going to get anything. Her voice got even throatier as she said this, obviously getting off on the idea.

When she finally pulled out (not before I pushed back and fucked the dildo myself for a while as she stayed still), I took off her harness and felt her pussy. It was soaked. Dripping wet.

She did as she said, she came twice and then I was left to kiss her goodnight and spoon into her, my aching cock nestled in her ass as she drifted off.

Why was she so turned on by denying me last night? Partly she enjoys it anyway, but what I’ve never mentioned on the blog is that when she is being dominant her rule is that I only get one cum a week maximum, and only at the weekend. No other days are allowed for that cum. She knew that by denying me Sunday night she had sentenced me to another full week of denial. This after 10 days already, she had made me miss the previous weekend due to my illegal cum, a cum that had been more wet dream than conscious in the first place… As she fell asleep and I breathed the scent of her skin I can honestly say I have rarely loved her more.

Sandy thinks I should put the pics up. She didn't order me to, she's being nice, but said she thinks people would want to see.

Pa5000 orgasm pain

2011-09-05T02:12:00.001+01:00

I'm now wearing the pa5000 for three days running, having put it on after 10 days of denial. I'd already earned a very painful caning for cumming without permission at the start of the ten days, and put the pa on to reduce the temptation.

Tonight and last night sandy and I played, though I haven't cum. She also took a very incriminating photo of me, which I can't decide to put up or not! More in another post. She is now sated and asleep, I'm horny and awake!

To cut a long story short I've been kind of masturbating, and I thought it's worth an update on what is and isn't possible in the pa5000.

Masturbating is possible, though not especially satisfying. you can get a finger to the sensitive bits. This is good, for me at least. No touch is fun for a while but after too long I get emotionally cranky.

Orgasm is physically possible. I've done it once. It was hard but if horny enough i could do it every time. I doubt I ever will again though. As you get very close to orgasm your cock swells, especially the head. The one time I came it put so much pressure on the cock head with trapped blood from the cock tube, the piercing was under pressure from the extra swelling, and when the cum arrived it had to force itself through a swollen shut urethra. That moment before orgasm was very painful, and the orgasm itself and the pulses of my cock afterwards were absolute agony. My head felt like it wanted to burst with pressure and the cum was hot fire in my urethra. Physically the pa which I've sized correctly is usually supremely comfortable. Even hard night time erections don't hurt or wake me. But that extra swelling turns it into a different device, one I'm scared of.

Tonight I've edged a few times, with difficulty. But twice I nearly tipped over and at that point where i would have normally let the inevitable happen, I fought like crazy to stop the orgasm before it started. I just started to swell, and already the pain already was such that I had every incentive to stop. Thankfully I managed it.

Devilish device!

Now do nag me to write up our playtime if I don't soon.

M

Vacation domination

2011-08-21T21:01:00.001+01:00

We are spending a couple of weeks in the alps camping with the kids. Great fun so far, although I wonder if the old van will make it back to the uk, lol.

Three nights in and sandy and I were alone in the tent for an hour sans kids. Cue playtime! It had been a good few days since we had had a chance. At first sandy said she just wanted a quick orgasm, but it very quickly became apparent to both her and me that she was in full blown cruel mean domme mode. That's what a few days off does to her! After a few minutes of kissing she started to manhandle my cock and balls, Teasing them a little but mostly smacking my balls, hard at first, then harder and harder. My already hard cock grew larger still as the ache spread through my stomach. When not smacking me she would masturbate me, wanking my hard cock, but no ordinary wank, she was digging her long nails deep into the flesh of my cock, making the tease extraordinarily painful as she moved her hand up and down. My naked body was grinding against hers in a mix of agony and pleasure, when the pain became harder to bear I would press my face against her soft breasts, sucking her nipples in deep as I moaned into her. My passion and pain, seeing me leaning in and sucking her breasts, all this brought a light to her eyes that was delicious to see. Seeing me suck her in lust and passion and desperation and pain was turning her on with the power of it making her want to hurt me all the more, which she did.

I started to pleasure her after a while, she enjoyed this, laying back and moaning gently, but she was a little dry (not uncommon at this point) and I offered to go down on her, making her wet with my mouth. she said (I will never forget this) 'no, you would enjoy that too much, I dont want you to have so much pleasure'. My pain and denial was her aphrodisiac, her desire.

As I played with her she started to fantasise, with no prompting, about having another man fuck her while I watch, about making me lie under her and suck her clit as he fucked her. She told me his cock would slide against my, Tongue as I licked her, and as she said this I swear she got noticeably wetter. The thought of that truly excited her. she told me he would then fuck her ass as I licked her, and when he came pull out so his cum dripped all over my face. Again she got noticeably turned on at the thought of my face covered in cum and very soon came herself, very hard, imagining my cock sliding into her cum filled ass, using her lovers cum as lube, feeling what I had been denied and still under orders not to cum, just to see what I was missing.

She had a second orgasm shortly after and after as she lay recovering I was hugging her tight, my aching desperate cock rubbing against her hip. 'I know what you are doing' she said. 'stop rubbing against me. I've touched your cock a bit, don't be greedy!' The sheer unfairness of having had two delicious orgasms herself but accusing me of being greedy for just a touch after all that pain, it drove me even deeper into subspace. The whole time my pain and denial had been the main driving factor in her play and her pleasure.

A final little humiliation. She decided to try for a third orgasm. After a couple of minutes of my teasing her soaking wet pussy she decided she didn't have one in her. 'I don't have another' she said and unceremoniously pushed me away, rolled over, pressed her butt against me and drifted off to sleep. Not a word more, no thank you, I was dismissed at her whim, my own pleasure inconsequential.

Kinky clubbing

2011-08-07T12:02:00.002+01:00

Last weekend sandy and I went to a fetish club. An outdoor one. Lots of great equipment outdoors, an indoor pool (nude of course), good food and a very sunny day. I went with sandy and a friend, actually my 'friends' best friend who is extremely subby.

I'm sadly not in a writing mood so this will be short and sweet. I spent the day switching between subbing to sandy and doming the friend. A strange experience given that from moment to moment I was swapping. one moment I was tying a chest harness and rope arm binder on my friend, next being ordered to get drinks by sandy. The armbinder got a couple of nice compliments! One period I had the friend tied to a pole by her collar, neck stretched out, arms held out to her sides as i whipped her ass deep red, alternating teasing her very wet pussy. A bit later sandy had me pulling a sulky round the field at high speed, laughing her head off at the fun of it, and with a strict order that I was not to pull up my shorts which were gradually falling down with the running. I ended up parked up next to a bunch of mistresses who were very amused at my half exposed ass.

Actually it's a hell of a lot of fun pulling a sulky at speed. Hope I do that again! Not sexual, just plain fun.

Highlight was probably the sulky, a proper kids and go karts experience that, but with nudity thrown in! Next would be the friend who has an uncanny but wicked ability to cum on command. I mean literally head to toe orgasm just by being ordered to. I was stunned how forceful both her orgasms were given I had stopped touching her minutes before the order was given. What's more she stayed horny after. Cool! Now if I could learn how to train a girl to do that the way she was trained I would be dead pleased!

M

Am I allowed to fuck?

2011-08-06T22:45:00.001+01:00

I had an interesting conversation with sandy today. We were thinking of going to a swingers club some friends invited us to. I mentioned that these days if a cute guy came on to her she was much more likely to play with him. She agreed. I asked if she would mind if I fucked someone while there and her response surprised me in it's strength. No. You are mine.

So there it is, I can play, I can have a sub of my own, but that ultimate act is hers alone. Even while she shares it with others herself she wouldn't want me to do the same.

She said the only pussy my cock will get to feel is hers, and then only rarely. Then she laughed.

Yum!

Ps. We had a rare but long vanilla lovemaking a few days ago. We must have been fucking for a good part of an hour. Slow, loving, no haste, bodies tight entwined and beautiful. It's a long time since we did that, not even a hint of a naughty fantasy. It was delicious!

I have found the holy grail

2011-07-27T23:30:00.003+01:00

A year passed. Winter changed into Spring. Spring changed into Summer. Summer changed back into Winter. And Winter gave Spring and Summer a miss and went straight on into Autumn. Until one day...

A ring, a ring shalt thou have in thine holiest of holyies. Therein to reside the one they call Prince Albert. Verily shall his presence command the masses, the lowly peniletry, his lowly subject.

And so It came to pass that the prince took up residence, subjugating his peniletry with the aid of his trusty polycarbonate ring of power, magiked into being by the great miller.

.............

So five chastity belts later, home made 1, cb2000, cb6000, neosteel sport, and now pa5000. Finally I have found my grail. I've worn the pa5000 5 days non stop so far, and apart from a very very slight tenderness in the piercing now and then it's been totally comfortable. Not a hint of pain except when I'm absolutely fully erect and at my very hardest.. Then it starts to feedback enough to calm me down. Even the night-time wood does not wake me. And I'm a very light sleeper! The sleep problem was one of the things thats stopped the cb6000 working for me.

I came with it the first night after my ass fucking. I was horny, sandy asleep and after a long time trying I just barely managed to tip over the edge. It hurt so fucking much I will never never do that again, there was no pleasure there.

I conclude then that it is effective, makes it very hard to touch myself, almost impossible to get to the point of Cumming as the feedback gets intense when close, and nobody would want that orgasm twice! I can sleep, ride a motorcycle, play sport, it's very easy to clean and I can even at a push pee standing up. Yet it's constant reminder that I can't cum, that sandy has the key.

I have found the holy grail. Problem is sandy has no intention to let me out yet :) she released me tonight for a long tease and a blow job, and to make her cum. That's six orgasms this week for her, famine to feast! I was then relocked and she hid the key before sending me to hang out the laundry and give her a foot rub.. I have no idea if I will be let out soon but she is enjoying her new found power for now, as am!

Finally the right belt for me, fantastic!

Arse fucking as therapy?

2011-07-24T10:23:00.002+01:00

As if to put the lie to my last post this morning brought probably the best sex I've had in a long while, and the first time for a while I've been on the receiving end of things...

Sandy and I woke up after a boozy and fun night with friends, lazing about in bed and talking about the problems we've been having. Though the conversation was a little uncomfortable at times it was caring on both sides, unlike the last few days. The conversation did not last too long and made us both feel a bit closer.

Cue a little more lazing around and then, no idea why, we starting talking about her fucking me with the strap on. It was obvious it's been two weeks since she had cum as within a minute of this talk she was feeling horny at the thought of taking me that way. I snuggled up closer and whispered in her ear imagine doing that while I was locked in my cock cage, unable to cum while she took me anally. As I said this I teased her pussy gently, and only momentarily. Her response was immediate and unequivocal... 'go and do it now!'

Eh? I wasn't expecting that. I was hard as a rock, I looked at her unsure and she stared me down, Now! She repeated. Get my cock into a cock tube? Yes mistress. I took myself and my tube to the bathroom where I stood under a stone cold shower hoping it would achieve the impossible, the last thing I had seen as I left was my wife's beautiful long legs splayed and her hand sliding up and down her wet slit. My mind kept casting back to that, and what was about to happen. It was a long shower!

I got back to the bedroom with a semi flaccid cock locked in a chastity belt, semi lasted about 2 seconds after I entered the room finding her still spread wide and teasing herself slowly and gently. My hairless submissive looking locked cock Immediately sprang to full (and slightly uncomfortable) hardness and I jumped in bed, crushing my body against hers and teasing her very hot slit with my fingers. Another surprise, she was impatient, desperate for her fantasy to become real. I had barely touched her when she ordered me to get the strap on and her pretty jewelled butt plug. I hesitated, lying on top of her and enjoying the feeling of her skin and breasts against my body, again finding myself surprised as seconds later she said 'Now!' with a don't waste any more time sternness. I did as I was told immediately.

By the time I found the toys she was on all fours, her finger buried between her now very red and swollen labia and her ass exposed waiting for the plug. My tongue went straight to her hole, tasting her pussy then pushing deep into her ass for a few seconds before her demand for me to plug her was repeated. The pretty cold steel plug slipped in so easily, a quick intake of breath at it's widest point and then a low moan as it's cold weight buried inside her made it's presence felt. I could smell her all over my mouth and hands. Wasting no time she got up and slipped the strap on harness on, a pretty leather pair of panties with a Brazilian rear, a thin strap that buries between her pussy lips, and the pink large cock at the front. unable to help myself I leaned in and sucked her cock deep. I love sucking her cock, last time she liked it too, forcing it deep and pressing my head in. This time she let me suck her down twice maybe before again, impatiently, lustfully told me to get on my hands and knees..

It's a big cock, the head popped in painlessly but as soon as she started moving it began to hurt, and I knew the widest part was yet to come. I didn't expect then, that a few thrusts later, as I lay face down on the bed with my arse raised, that she would start moaning like a woman drowning in desire and pressing her pussy against my arse, whispering in my ear how hungry my slutty hole is, that ive taken the whole length in already. I had. I could feel her cool pussy against my arse, it felt sublime... I was moaning like an animal, my arms spread, locked cock grinding against the bed, she was now thrusting in and out hard and fast, forcefully, slapping my arse hard now and then. Pushing my face down into the bed with her hand on the back of my neck, talking so fucking dirty, how I was a slut, she was fucking her slut husband up the arse and using him, debasing him, so dirty. Her butt plug was moving inside her with every thrust as she pounded me. She was on fire, her breasts were rubbing against my back and she leant in with a few especially forcefully thrusts and told me how she was violating me and had my cock locked, no orgasm, just an arse fucking, so so dirty....

Perhaps 10 minutes of this went on, I loved every second, groaning the whole time, when suddenly she lent back, kneeling up, her cock deep deep in my arse, if I could touch myself now I'd come, she said. Do it! I replied and quickly heard her whimpering as her fingers found their way into the front of her leather panties. I craned my neck around, seeing, just out of the corner of my eye, this beautiful dominant woman, naked, pert breasts heaving, her hand in her panties playing, her hips tight against me filling me with her big cock, occasionally thrusting deeper to keep me violated as she took her pleasure. She came heaving, almost screaming, pounding into me a few times for extra stimulation, then slowing down her thrusts as she came down from her cum, lying over my back and relaxing, still deep inside me.

She lay there perhaps five minutes and I, my cock, ached for her with the force of her orgasm..

I was of course expected to give her another orgasm a short while later, for sandy they always come in twos or threes. My own pleasure was not even considered. She wanted me denied, it had enhanced her pleasure.. As I write this I'm still locked.

Holy fuck, I've missed this, and the way she spoke about it she had missed fucking me, had been wanting to do it for a while. I felt about as submissive, as taken, as put in my place as a man can ever feel, lying beneath her, my own wife, my cock locked and my lack of orgasm used as a tool for her pleasure, my arse penetrated, slapped. Her animalistic approach to taking from me what she needed, feeding off my responses and my lust, using me, driving me down deep into the space I needed to reconnect and feel loved.

Things are tough all over

2011-07-21T12:57:00.001+01:00

Extra point to anyone who recognises the reference :)

Things are a bit crap in the outsidevanilla household these days. Part of the reason I'm writing less is because we are doing less. Sandy is getting less and less interested in sex as the months go on.

It started with her going back to work full time a year or so ago. She doesn't cope well with full time work especially when you add two kids into the equation. I've upped the support I'm giving to the point where I am shattered but it's not enough. She is tired, irritable, isn't getting enough downtime and is unable to relax and make the most of it when she does get it. End result is she has nearly no sex drive. We've dropped frequency over the last year down to once a week or less. Even that is a quickie as often as not.

Im well aware that some readers might think once a week is plenty. Sandy sure does. For me though I've compromised over the years from who I really am, a highly sexual man, and as the years went by the compromise got more extreme and harder to bear. Our three year d/s relationship changed that but died as the pressure of her new job took it's toll on her.

The pressure it's putting on us is huge. I'm unhappy and feeling distant from her, and very disconnected from my own sexuality. She is distant and the lack of intimacy is affecting her too. It's causing arguments that resolve nothing. She is trying to make more effort but her effort stops outside the bedroom door. Basically she is flirty but her brain usually shuts down if it looks like it's going to become real.

All in all we are back where we started but with slightly better communication between us. We've tried to halt the slide the last few months with no lasting success. I have no idea where this is leading, no idea why I'm writing this post except that I want to get it off my chest. I'd like to think things will improve but I don't believe that. This problem has been with us for 15 years and if there was a simple solution we would have found it by now.

Sex or job. That's what it boils down to. And we can't afford for her not to work.

Meh!

Mourning the loss

2011-07-18T09:56:00.001+01:00

I find that most of the blogs I used to read when I started blogging are gone. That and being busy mean that I have little interest in reading blogs these days. My own blog is now getting to be a bit of s trooper, which I never expected.

Elle, ms Inconspicuous, lil' flower petal, and so many others have shut down. I realise each time I look at my blogroll that I miss them. Now it's mostly full of tumblr, great for porn but not so much writing lol.

Thumper and Tom Allen are the only blogs that are still going! Although Tom of course started much before then.

M

Lasering update

2011-07-09T08:52:00.001+01:00

Florida Dom asked what being lasered was like. Well the short answer is painful. It's like a rubber band being snapped against your skin, done repeatedly until the whole area is covered. Some parts are not too painful, others, balls, arse, base of cock hurt like mad. But then I have dark hair and olive skin and absorb a lot of the laser energy. My dark blonde pale skin wife had much less pain.

My cock and balls have had several sessions over the last four months and are very deliciously smooth. My groin has had only one, the latest one. After shaving you get lasered. Then the hair keeps growing, oddly enough. By about two weeks later I had 5-8mm long regrowth, and at that point all the hairs finally die off and start falling out. It's odd but strangely cool seeing them fall away painlessly leaving you bare.

In my case I've been left patchy, about 90% of the hair has been killed. The rest is still strong so it looks, well, mangy lol. One or two more sessions will finish it. Paler haired people take note, you won't get away with 3 sessions. My wife needed 6 and isn't quite perfect yet, although she is yummy already!

Oh and later sessions hurt much less, fewer hairs you see.

Update on the friend

2011-07-07T20:13:00.001+01:00

Well I confess to feeling a little down. Of course having a cold always makes me feel more emotional than usual, but there is also another reason for it. I'm getting myself used to the idea of walking away from the 'friend'. She is a great person and I thought that we could be good friends, and perhaps even lovers. However I've noticed over the last month or so that the relationship is rather one way. When we are together we get on well and have fun, but I find her very flaky at keeping in touch or even responding to a hello. Frankly thats not what i want in my life. I want friends I can rely on a little more. Nothing too intense, but equally its nice to know I'm not the only one thinking of the other.

My conclusion is that she simply doesn't want what I want, or isn't the kind of character I need. Shame as I thought she was and i do rather like her.

I may be mistaken, time will tell, but i doubt it. Shame.

How to make a metal pa-5000 ring

2011-06-30T12:13:00.001+01:00

So as promised a quick tutorial on how to convert a standard ring for a prince Albert to lock in a pa-5000 chastity tube.

First buy a horseshoe ring with a diameter that fits your cock head comfortably. The pa is under some strain when you get hard anyway, you don't want to exacerbate that with a ring that's too small for you cock when it grows hard. The gauge should be whatever You are happy wearing. My advice is not to go below 2.4mm as the smaller the gauge can cut more easily (cheesewire effect). You might get away with 1.6mm though.

Make sure that one of the balls on the end of the ring is screw on, and as large as possible. Don't get an internally threaded ring, the external ones are easier to find and stronger.

Buy or borrow a dremel. Make sure you have a grinding wheel and some cut-off wheels. Also you need a good metal vice.

Now clamp the ring in the vice tight! Make sure one of the balls is attached tight and sticking out above the vice. Use some thin card to protect the ring from the vice. This is going in your cock you do not want microabrasions on the metal that either cut you or provide a home for bacteria. What I mean is put card either side of the ring before you clamp the vice.

Starting with the grinding wheel you want to flatten off the front and back of the ball. Note that they are not parallel but slightly angled in. Make sure you do both sides evenly so you have room to grind a slot later without reaching the screw in the middle of the ball. Also be careful of the relative angle the ring comes out of the ball. That decides how steep or shallow it enters your pa. Use the plastic rings as a template!!

Use water to keep the metal cool if you need to, and keep taking it from the vice and trying in the chastity tube until it is a nice fit. It should end up deep in the lock hole with none of the ball protruding from the hole.

Now it gets a bit harder. With it in the hole turn the lock hard until it leaves a tiny mark on the flat surface of the ball. Use some ink on it if that helps. You need to know where to cut the slot for the lock.

Get your cut off wheels. Depending on thickness you may need 2-3 of them to match the thickness of the locking slot in the plastic ring. Put these on the dremel and you now have a thick wheel that can be used to grind a slot in the flat surface of the ball. Start slow, get the position right! Wear eye protection! Regularly trying the ring in the tube to make sure the slot is correrly placed, and that you don't go deeper than needed. Too deep and you will cut off the threads inside the ball. Eventually you will have a ball with two flat sides, a horizontal slot, it fits nice and snug in the tube and locks in place.

Finally smooth off any sharp edges.

During this process I found that the ball often unscrewed as I ground it. Tighten it up when you need. Once it's a bit flat you can put it against the flat top of the vice to stop further spinning. At the end tighten the ball until the slot is in the right direction to fit the pa-5000 with the ring protruding forwards. Again use the plastic ring as a template.

Last step. Cut off the other end of the horseshoe to a length you prefer. Round off the sharp edge well, this is going to go through your pa regularly it needs to be round, not square and definitely not sharp!! Maybe use a nail file to further smooth the metal until you can't feel any roughness.

Now wash it well and put it on. Hand over the key and be afraid. This baby can't easily be snapped off!

No pubic hair, ever

2011-06-30T00:05:00.001+01:00

Well it's official. Sandy has decided she prefers me hairless and has told me to get it lasered off. After mulling the idea for a while I had kind of got attached to my manly dark hair again but it seems having experienced me bare she prefers it.

So I will be getting lasered starting last weekend.

I was not given too much of a choice :) I'm not often playing sub to her these days but at some level she still considers herself to be in charge. This is one of those occasions.

Alter egos

2011-06-29T23:12:00.001+01:00

Pet, goddess, cad.

All names I've recently heard on the scene for alter egos, in some cases even a normal but different name will do. Which led to a discussion about power exchange in a long term relationship. Is it possible for the majority of us or does it eventually reach a level equilibrium without too much excess.

I know there are exceptions. Please don't identify this or that exception. But i ask, for most of us can it be done? I am a pretty demanding dom, but found myself wondering if the darker recesses of that persona could come out with someone I had lived with, had children with. Would pet get the best part of me while my wife would be treated with kid gloves in comparison. In other words do I need to separate myself from my life partner to be truly dominant.

Vice versa for a sub.

It's something that has me thinking now, and also wondering if I'm unusual in these thoughts, or if the alter ego is other people's way of separating themselves to help them manage this problem.

A fun evening

2011-06-29T23:10:00.001+01:00

Spent the evening having beers with my 'friend' and her best friend. Fun, and amusing talking kink in the middle of a bar in central London. Turns out my friend is more experienced than I thought, but still very new to it all and finding her feet.

Still not sure where this is going, but having fun anyway.

In the middle of it pet texted me with a picture of my horny pussy, as I had ordered. This made me smile on so many levels. The fact that she is such a good sub, so horny and in my palm. Also it made me almost spit out my drink in amusement, being sat in a bar with a girl I'm flirting with while my desperately horny sub sends me pictures of my property. very cute wet property it was too!

Pet if you read this, thanks for bringing a smile to my face, and sorry about your frustration but hey, it works for me!

X

The highlight of the evening?

2011-06-25T22:01:00.001+01:00

I wanted to be pampered. Ordered my very horny, in fact dripping pet to prepare the shower for me, then wash my body, head to toe, and dry me. I've never enjoyed a shower so much. Just relaxing as a very needy pet caressed and washed every inch of my body thoroughly, keeping one hand on my cock when she could. I think she enjoyed herself too!

Told her she should be honoured to be allowed to wash and enjoy my body like that.

After I lay on the bed reading a while as she kissed and licked my arse.

Bliss!

Drink with my pet

2011-06-24T19:46:00.001+01:00

Im at the pub with my pet and have some truly enjoyable plans for the evening.

Many of them will involve her mouth, but she won't be allowed to speak!

She's currently in the toilets edging herself for my amusement. I expect she will be a nervy wreck soon, heheh.

Prince Albert chastity update

2011-06-18T09:38:00.001+01:00

It turns out my pa is not a quick healer. It's still not strong and needs reasonably gentle handling if it's not to get tender. Perhaps it's the presence of a previous pa that does it, or it's just me. I think it's going to need a couple of years to be properly strong.

However I really wanted to try the pa5000 and it's plastic rings are too thick a gauge for me. Also, plastic is so easy to break. Where is the security in that? So my trusty dremel and I set about converting a horseshoe ring to fit. I am currently locked in as a trial. So far I've worn it 24 hours. It's extremely comfortable except for nighttime erections that cause the sensitive piercing area a bit of stress. It will be great in a year or two.

If anyone is interested in how to make their own metal pa5000 ring please comment and I will post more on it.

Mixed up and happy

2011-06-18T09:32:00.001+01:00

I'm Afraid my blog, what of it there us with such rare posting, is rather mixed up these days. I have a sub, the deliciously responsive mrs discontented. She brings out the wicked in me something fierce. I have my adorable wife sandy. She isn't especially dominant these days, but has flashes of it. She can best be described as a selfish hungry slut right now. And cock tease. She loves me to abuse her for her pleasure, and enjoys 'not' returning the favour. Neither sub nor Dom but kinky for sure.

At some level I am submissive to her, but only very very loosely at the moment.

I have another friend. She is pretty, fun and has the cutest accent (shes American). So far we've only kissed but given time I see adventurous and likely submissive tendencies in her. Who knows where this will lead.

So my plate is rather full these days. But I don't know if I'm coming or going, top or bottom or just plain 'perve' as mrs d says. Actually I do, I'm switching between modes very easily, but I don't know what any given week may bring.

That's all for now folks. Except for this. Mrs d if you are reading, your last orgasm is on tuesday. Better make it a good one!

Mykey

Slightly nervous

2011-05-17T23:41:00.001+01:00

A conversation with sandy tonight while playing. Seems she wants me to get my chastity belt sorted soon. And she doesn't seem like she's going to be generous with the orgasms.

Hmm

Domination, that's what we need ...

2011-05-11T23:10:00.000+01:00

I keep meaning to write an update on my time with my delicious sub. I haven't found enough time to do it justice but a few quick words are in order.

She gives a mean blow job. I certainly enjoyed lying back and relaxing as she worshipped my cock, slow and lazy. I could really get used to that,and to the delicious happy noises she made doing it.

Rope harness. I've done quite a few but never before combined one with a spanking. What a great way to control a person. She wasn't tied, all limbs free. But I could grab a handful of rope to stop poor mrs d escaping while I spanked her ass longer and harder than I've ever done before. And each time she tried to crawl away a convenient rope handle dragged her back, pulling on her breasts as an added benefit. Rope is controlling I'm such a delicious sexy looking and dynamic way. Of course my sexy little pet squirming and begging didn't add to my pleasure at all!

I can't remember highlights but I did tease the poor lass mercilessly. We had a lovely lunch (scuzzy burgers in a proper English cafe of all places!), lovely mostly for her company :) then back for more chatting and more play.

M

She is so deliciously subby!

2011-04-28T07:48:00.001+01:00

I've met a lovely girl funnily enough through her blog. She is cute, very sassy, and so deliciously subby it's hard to resist pushing and teasing her more and more :) being a fellow blogger I know she could read this so I won't go in to too many details but suffice to say I am fizzing with ideas to tease and torment her. Lol!

I emailed her after reading that she wanted to try shibari. I adore rope bondage but it takes a lot of time and practice, I've not yet found anyone to practice and play with regularly. I actually didn't expect a reply especially considering that to my knowledge she had no idea who I was. It turns out she reads my blog.

The email back was, she hoped, reserved. I found it refreshingly open and very enthusiastic, lol. To cut a long story short we emailed, texted, chatted, got on very well. She doesn't live very close but it's close enough. She is very submissive with a cheeky bratty side that makes me smile and gives me good excuses to be mean. Poor abused subby, I've got her churning up inside with lust and frustration at times. While I am sure we will play with rope plenty when we meet, I'm glad that it's progressed beyond that. She is now my sub, and becoming a friend. Hope we get on in person, pretty sure we will. Whats fantastic is that she really gets being a sub, the whole I want it and don't want it dynamic that so appeals to my dark side.

I don't know if i will put many details on here yet, we will see.

Sandy is fantastic about it. She is more than happy that I've found her and supportive of this. I can't ask for more.

So meet Mrs Discontented. Hopefully slightly less so now :)

Quick sub story

2011-04-11T16:58:00.001+01:00

He knelt in the hotel room waiting for her to arrive. They had been flirting for a while going back and fore with text message, getting to know one another, sharing dirty little fantasies… but this was the first time they met.

His heart pounded.
She had found his submissive streak and it had appealed to her. She knew that she had to experience it, take it in hand and let herself loose. She had got excited many times imagining what she would do if she were there. She knew what she wanted and tonight she had demanded nothing less than his complete submission. So he waited, totally naked except for a collar and leash, and blindfold, his body nude, legs spread. At her demand he had shaved his cock and balls completely, his submission highlighted by his hairless state. She had insisted on that! From one wrist hung a cuff waiting for her to attach it to the other wrist. The hotel room door was closed but unlocked.

His heart pounded.

She had dressed for the occasion. She had considered a number of outfits, classic dress, leather domme, simple lingerie or even something like a nurses uniform but in the end had settled on a business suit. For the simple reason that she felt powerful wearing it, and her smart dress highlighted his naked, plaything status. So she had dressed, smart black panties, stockings, black bra and a crisp white shirt. A knee length skirt and jacket completed her look. She fully expected to make him work to even get a peek up her skirt. As for an orgasm? This night was about her pleasure and she was in the mood to tease. She had already decided that he would make her cum, but she intended to send him away hard, aching, dripping with need for her still, her taste lingering on his mouth and face…

She finished her drink, walked up to the room 10 minutes late, she expected him to wait, then pushed open the door…

A little play

2011-04-11T16:55:00.002+01:00

We had a little play at the weekend. Sandy, poor girl, ended up having 5 orgasms given to herself. I was required to kneel on the floor and watch, masturbate, put on a show for her and be real close to the edge and not cum. I wasnt allowed to touch her pussy at all, not even once, though she allowed me to suck her fingers clean.

Seeing me dripping horny and realising she had yet another orgasm in her she would give this delighted wicked laugh, then bury her fingers in her snatch again, having her pleasure once more.

Im still unsatisfied and very very horny!

M

I'm going on a sub hunt

2011-03-28T23:30:00.001+01:00

A drink for the person who guesses the song behind the twisted lyrical association.

Actually been looking for a few weeks. Might have struck lucky. Early days but she is smart, confident and very naughty. Lives miles away, let's hope when we meet we click!

With Sandys blessing. How cool is that?

Regarding sandy, she's is loving being abused these days. A few days ago she came with my cock deep inside her pussy, my fingers deep in her ass, face down and being well and truly fucked and forced. She came so damn hard and I timed my orgasm with hers, as my cock grew that extra bit and started to pulse it set off a higher peak in her orgasm. She was limp after, didn't even twitch when I pulled my fingers out.

I enjoyed that!

Red pant day

2011-03-18T07:34:00.001Z

Today I've been asked to wear sandy's red panties because it's red nose day in the uk.

She was very entertained watching me put them on and get embarrassed.

M

Photo pervery

2011-03-12T17:47:00.001Z

So heels and hedone seem to like my bum. Being a bit of an exhibitionist I thought I might put it out for all to see.

Sorry for the rough pic. Been under a camper swapping engines all day!

M xx

Cuntilicious

2011-02-28T22:37:00.000Z

Well im amazed and touched that some of you are still here and interested in an update...

A few weeks ago on thumpers blog I wrote

'A year or two of strict orgasm control did bring sandy and I together. It created strains also, but on balance was good for us. Now the flr dynamic is behind us and I come when i like. It’s a strange feeling and I feel a keen sense of loss. However I have no interest in going back to being orgasm controlled and the longer time passes the less I want to actually go back. I wonder if it’s a phase or if I’ve had the submissive ‘burned out’. I only see it as a game I would play occasionally.

Yet, i worry about the lack of the cement that was added to our marriage by her owning my sexuality.'

This remains true, although I dont feel the loss anymore. I believe that the sub really was burned out of me, my vanilla and dominant sides are much more to the fore these days. I fantasise about being submissive, but its only an occasional bedroom thing. It was harder being a sub, constantly being gnawed at being horny and not in as much control of my day, whereas now I can cum and relax, I generally feel more relaxed. The loss of the dynamic has not affected us, which is good. Sandy tells me I am a much more caring husband for having done this for three years, so obviously a fair chunk of it has stuck... No bad thing and probably why the change has not been bad for us.

Also, and lets not underestimate this, its mid winter, we are both very busy at work and tired, colds and flu have taken their toll. Come summer and higher sex drive things will hot up I am sure. I am also fairly sure we will go back to being sub and Mistress again someday, not soon, and I suspect for shorter periods, but we will. Its not like we have stopped being kinky, but we are both rather enjoying this unusual thing called vanilla together.

Sandy has broken up with her boyfriend. Partly she found that she connects better with me without him around, she is a one man woman emotionally. Sex with others is an occasionaly thing for her we think. But also because he was getting much harder work, more demanding. She has a relationship, family, kids, demands. She doesnt need more demands. Had he stayed an occasional fun friend and fuck she may well still be seeing him, she liked his company and enjoyed the sex a lot. After all his pressure (he wanted a lot more of her) she is glad to be out of it, though she has no regrets. For me it was fun, we explored a fantasy which we both enjoyed, she has rediscovered her breasts as a source of sexual pleasure (which has of course brought me benefits). So on balance fun while it lasted, and some small benefits to the relationship.

One final thing, I decided to get lasered after all, my cock, balls and arse are now permanently hair free and very smooth, as is Sandy's delicious pussy, which has just a landing strip to show me the way. Cuntilicious she calls it, and it is! Maybe I will show you a picture...

M

a short update

2011-01-09T18:23:00.004Z

Sorry everyone for the time since my last update. Everything is ok with Sandy and me, but there have been a few changes.

1 - Sandy and I went through a short patch of arguing nastily just before christmas. Bit of a relapse of our old patterns. It has passed now but play was quiet between us for a little while, partly because of that and partly because of course its a busy time for those of us with kids!

2 - I read thumpers update on turbulence which mirrored what Sandy and I were feeling. Perhaps we felt it a bit more deeply. I was feeling less subby, maybe tiredness, maybe the argument, but mainly because we have lived this lifestyle for a long time now and I think it was getting a bit tiring, like we needed a break and to reset ourselves. Sandy felt it too, hard to say which of us needed the break more but once we argued we stopped playing for a short while, then found that actually we were enjoying the break from d/s. I suspected this was coming for a couple of months before christmas but wasnt sure of myself.

3 - Sandy cuckolding me (specifically having vanilla sex with her boyfriend) got her back into penetrative sex and more traditional sex. Kind of got her enjoying it again. She realised she missed it and rather liked me taking a bit more control during sex occasionally.

So cut a long story we have done d/s a long time and need a break. Thats what we are doing. I am masturbating practically daily, we have mostly vanilla sex and i have fucked her quite a few times in the last month. Its been really rather cool and we have both enjoyed it. Sandy did say that my stint as her sub has made me a more gentle and easygoing husband. I dont know how long it will last, a month, a year? There is no sign yet of either of us tiring of it. I am fairly sure we will go back to d/s sometime but I have no idea at all when.

As for Sandy's boyfriend and cuckolding...? She is still kind of seeing him but once a week was proving too much, she didnt have enough time and energy to do that, see enough of her family, see her friends and do her hobbies. They havent seen each other for about three weeks. It may be that she calls it off soon, or perhaps it just settles down to friends with benefits. Only time will tell. She enjoyed it and apart from the pressure to see more of him its been good fun.

In the meantime updates to this blog may be very much less frequent, as there isnt so much to blog about :) Now and then Im sure I will pop up!

M

a sho4t update

2011-01-09T18:23:00.001Z

Chastity belted travelling

2010-11-28T11:12:00.002Z

It turns out my lovely Sandy is very disappointed that my business trip to NY (where I am right now) came too soon for us to use the piercing and the pa5000 to keep me chaste. Much more disappointed than I expected. She has got more into controlling my cock recently than I realise.

In fact she said that once it works she will never want me to travel without being locked first.

AAAAhhhhhhhh!

Underwater Assfuck

2010-11-23T10:21:00.001Z

A very different day yesterday.

Sandy and I have argued a bit recently. Too much work, too little time. After a big barney I was feeling distant and not looking forward to having sex that night, not feeling close. Given how little we see of each other mid week we knew we should make a big effort to spend time together but it was feeling pressured.

We had a shower together in the morning. In the shower she pushed me against the wall and kissed me hard, roughly pushing her finger into my arse. Which was fun, but stopped after a few minutes. A short while later I did the same to her and she reacted, threw her head back and started to whimper. I pushed her face against the shower wall and pretended to fuck her from behind, whispered, not seriously, that we had all the tools we need on hand for me to fuck her in the arse. In answer she pulled my cock between her legs and started pressing it against herself. It wasn't going to go in like that so I reached over, rubber plenty of cream on me and she pushed back against me, pressing hard and wiggling her luscious arse until with a pop I was in, cock ring still in place. What followed was a pretty rough fuck, I pushed in and out fast without much warm up, my free hand either pulling her head back hard by her hair, or pinching her nipples as hard as my slippery hand would allow. She was frigging herself desperately as I fucked her, obviously needing to cum badly. In the end I got there first by a slim margin, and she came a minute later while I continued to move inside her.

Her knees literally buckled afterward, she had to sit on the floor of the shower with the door open to get her breath back.

a good start to the day and certainly took the pressure off.

That night we got to bed and were planning to sleep. I told her about a conversation i had at a munch about Figging. She asked what that was and I described it, I then told her how it feels as the ginger warms then starts to bite. At first she was just interested and curious as to when I had tried it, but as I described the feeling her breathing began to speed up and she started to rub herself on me. It became very apparent that she liked the idea. I suggested a quick orgasm before sleep which she accepted funnily enough, only she wasn't in the mood for quick. I slid my finger in her arse and played with her, she begged me to put tiger balm on it. Great! Bend over the bed and get it, I told her, and as she bent over the edge of the bed, her head hanging down and her delectable butt in the air I continued to tease her arse and her clit. Took her ages to find the balm (can you guess why?) and she passed me back a pink large dildo at the same time. Slut!

It didn't take her long to cum, I had one hand ramming the dildo into her pussy hard, my finger coated liberally in tiger balm was simultaneously moving in and out of her arse which by now was deliciously burning hot. With my free hand I grabbed her hair hard in my fist, pulling her head back, stretching her neck, or pushing it back down over the edge of the bed. I wasn't gentle at either end, dildo arse or hair but she just pushed her hand between her legs, moaning almost non stop, then tipped over into a huge orgasm. She came while making guttural animal sounds, her hair pulled even harder and head pulled back, and as she came down the slow continuing movement of the dildo and finger brought her quite a few aftershocks.

Unexpected events

2010-11-17T22:10:00.001Z

Its late so a very quick update.

Sandy got back late last night, she had had a very good time. Her lover has figured out how to make her cum, of which he was very proud. Helped by the fact that she had not had sex for a week and they had been fucking a long time! She came a second time too, this time by her own hand while he was fucking her. He also came inside her, apparently he grows very big when he is close to cumming, and she had a very dreamy expression while she told me this. He even fucked her from behind standing up against a wall. I haven't done that position with her in years and I really love it. its a huge tease knowing he got to experience it and I didn't.

In fact she has admitted she isn't missing me inside her at all. While I suspect that is partly her playing up to the fantasy, its also fairly true. She doesn't seem to need to fuck often and has her new man giving her more than enough.

I am needless to say very horny, and feeling very churned up inside with submissive feelings.

On a different note she got the tickleberry newsletter, in it they have a very sexy and evil looking kalis teeth chastity device in sexy shiny metal. I thought she would consider it too extreme, but she really likes the idea and is seriously thinking of buying one for christmas. she made a comment to the effect can I believe she is thinking of buying me a chastity belt? She admitted she likes the idea of teasing me while wearing it!

Nervous? Yup.

M

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Very quick update

2010-11-16T23:27:00.003Z

She is out.

We havent had full blown orgasmic for her sex since last tuesday, although we have done a lot of teasing. Last tuesday was the sex we had the night of her last visit to the boyfriend. Its been a busy week! Last night we fooled round, but she would not let me give her an orgasm as she was saving it for tonight. She enjoyed 'saving herself' for her boyfriend. Today I got home from work and shortly found her upstairs shaving her pussy, leaving a cute little landing strip... for him.

After dressing her up for later she demanded I put on the panties she has work all day and keep them on until she reurns, a little humiliation in the mix. No lockup, but im not allowed to cum either, of course.

Wonder what she is up to now, while I catch up on work?

M

Giving up the hair

2010-11-15T21:56:00.001Z

My wife and I have been thinking of laser hair removal for several years now but it has always seemed too expensive. Today on my way back from the gym I walked into a salon andfound the prices to be little more than I pay for a waxing. The lady who does it has skin and hair like mine and had a complete and smooth removal with four sessions. So I did a test patch to see if I react badly to it. I don't.

I came out thinking I can finally get rid of my hair properly, I have thick black hair that does not shave well. I used to wax but started to get ingrown hairs so stopped that too. Finally a solution.

Ten minutes later the permanence hit me. If you do this you will never again have hair there. Given that my hairy olive skinned body is 'manly' in my mind I suddenly balked at the idea that if in some years I change my mind there is no going back. Now I know that balls and crack I will never miss, its cleaner, feels nicer and does not show. But these days I am totally bare. My stomach and my groin. Am I happy being that way permanently? Probably not, or at least I'm not sure, but nor am i happy shaving....

Funnily enough sandy is happy for me to do everything except my stomach which she likes hairy sometimes. I did not expect her to prefer my groin bare but these days she does. I just can't see how it could look good like that with the hair on my stomach ending just when it should be getting thicker and blending into pubic hair. So how far should I go I just don't know.

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Bareback

2010-11-13T22:52:00.001Z

There has been a question for a while about sandy and her lover going bareback. For a while we had decided not to, but it has been a problem. Sandy really does not like condoms, she and I rarely used them and when we did they took the edge off sex for her. Her boyfriend hates them even more and can't cum with one on. Finally sandy loves the idea of him cumming inside her.

As they have got to know each other better and the trust had developed she has been reconsidering this. Combined with the results of a recent test and she has felt safe enough to go ahead. There was just one problem, she was not sure her coil was still working. For the last six months I have not cum inside her the few times we have fucked as we were not sure it would be safe. Last week she decided to remedy that. It turns out the coil is still safe.

As a result the last few times they have seen each other they have had a little bareback contact, but the last time, knowing the coil was good, was different. Very different. I was as usual locked up tight at home while my wife went out to play. I knew what was likely to happen as she had told me a few days ago that she had checked it out. I was therefore unsurprised when she got home with a very dreamy, happy and well fucked look on her face, unsurprised but very turned on. I was in fact straining against my belt as she walked in and lifted her skirt, reminding me she had gone out with no panties. She then arched her back, her nipples and breasts jutting out in front of her, betraying the lack of a bra, a bra she had worn on the way over.

Did I mention I had helped her dress, helped her choose her clothes, watched her put on her black lace top stockings and slip on her skirt without any panties. Looked in her eyes as she did it knowing the effect it would have on me and on him, as she stared at me defiantly and lustfully. That I was on my knees at her feet while she did that. I was, and I was finding it very hard to remain in my place rather than throw her to the bed and fuck her mercilessly. She had to be very forceful to keep me down there.

I am lying in my bed watching her strip, getting ready to climb in with me. Now naked she sways over to me swinging her hips, looking me in the eye. She beckons me over to her side of the bed where I am told to lie back, looking turned on and just a touch unsure of herself but doing it anyway, she turns her back to me and lowers her very puffy pussy on to my face, making sure her lips meet mine and then rubbing herself on to me. I wasn't sure of this either at first, but the moment her lips touched mine any thoughts left me, driven out by my lust. I am embarrassed to say that I licked and sucked, I pushed my tongue deep into her and I loved every moment of it. She tasted amazing, mostly just her but with a hint of that electrolytic tang of cum, and the smell of his body from the skin around her pussy was also very apparent. I was not ready when she got up a minute later but she simply turned around, pressed herself back on to me, and let me clean her and pleasure her while she played with my balls, my cock of course still being locked. That just felt soooooo good. This had been her fantasy, to make me do this while I was still locked up, and I enjoyed it as much if not more than her. That said she must have liked it a fair bit, because despite having cum twice while with him she still lay back and guided my hand between her legs to give her one last, but very very long and noisy orgasm.

I was of course left high and dry, but not before being taken to the edge enough times to make mini me weep copious tears of frustration.

Ps. I know that a cuck should not feel this way, not in 'real' cuckolding, but I am very amused that he still hasn't got close to making her cum. She does it herself when she is over there. She isn't an easy woman to please as many ex boyfriends and one current one can testify. Lol!

Pps. She told me the next day that she really enjoyed him fucking her properly, that he felt very hard and large inside her, and she felt incredibly naughty. In fact the reason I had not tasted much of him was because she had fucked him a second time and that time he had not cum. She had taken him in hand and basically told him to fuck her, ending up with her pole dancing as they call it, her on top. She still does not think that fucking him is so different to me, even though he is so large. She loves it physiologically, but the feeling is much the same. That does not mean however that she has any intention of letting me fuck her any time soon. She is she says getting all that she needs from him and is enjoying denying me.

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Disappointed...

2010-11-13T00:02:00.004Z

Sandy is away for the weekend with some friends.I'm going to miss her. I am also very horny for a number of reasons, which I will go in to in a bit. As a result she decided to be a bit mean and keep me locked in my belt for the duration of her trip. We were both looking forward to this.

I didn't even make it one full day. The neosteel, sexy though it looks and feels at first, is just a miserably uncomfortable thing to wear for more than a few hours. I ended up so uncomfortable that I was even getting ratty with the kids. By the time 12 hours had passed I texted her to get the location of the hidden emergency key. I am bummed by this. I am also going to find it hard to keep my promise and not cum, though I will. I am looking forward to the day my piercing is healed enough to use the pa5000.

Why am I so horny? Well last weekend sandy decided to give me a spoilt orgasm rather than my usual full one, so my body is unused to the loss of one week of release. She had to hold me down to stop me reaching over to finish myself off properly, it was that frustrating. Her eyes were glittering with enjoyment. This week she has teased me a lot, really a lot! Real on the edge for long periods of time stuff. Again without her control I would have cum and be damned, I was that close and desperate. Partly the extra teasing is because she decided last weekend when she spoilt my orgasm that this weekend I would not get to cum. She is away and I'm only allowed to cum on a weekend, so sorry Darling but you will have to miss out, its the rule. Her eyes were glittering again when she said that. So she enjoyed upping the ante further with extra severe teasing. Some of this extra teasing was also also set off by a very good night with her boyfriend which I will write about, which of course also made us both horny.

By the time I next cum again she will have cum about 10 times since my last proper one. Even her boyfriend will have cum more then me, and he only sees her once a week.

Its a hard life being a sub, but I wouldn't change it :)

M

Little sexy text exchange

2010-11-11T18:33:00.001Z

something v entertaining about driving past our house 2 get 2 his while u locked up xx

Good god that just made me so hard, As best I can! I am yours forever.

I know & u will b mine forever xx

Of course mistress I'm a very lucky man. Xxx

Of course u r. xx

The past touches the present

2010-11-09T20:12:00.001Z

Its a funny thing but you can never entirely shake off your past. We tried, and it is usually firmly in its place, but it seems our problems have left a wound that is more raw than I realised.

One of the most difficult things I faced in our marriage was the loss of the fun, open, experimental girl I met, to the sensible and repressed girl she became. I knew of course of that side of her, but the excitement of having a new man in her life had allowed her to break free temporarily. As a result I got a glimpse of a carefree woman who I feel in love with. Of course most of the next twelve years were not like that, though we tried to rekindle it often. After knock back and more knock backs I became very wary of allowing my own passion to rise around her, or of trying anything new. She became very forceful with the word no, and not very discriminatory. I thought I had come to terms with this, and of course now she is becoming more like that woman again it feels felt wonderfully freeing. Yet not completely it turns out.

The other day it came up that her boyfriend had rubbed his cum on her breasts, and more stunningly that she liked it, it turned her on. He also pushes her around in bed, getting her to do things that he fancies when he feels like it, in short he feels free to do what he wants with her, and she likes it. Vanilla things in case you are wondering. She was telling me this sadly, sadly because she realised how much of me she had repressed over the last decade. Of course she knew it already but experiencing it for real, finding that she liked it, made it all more immediate. She mentioned the cum spreading as though to say why have I not tried that. I have of course and said so, most recently in the last few months, but she still would not allow it. She was so forceful and I am so used to backing away that she had not noticed me trying. As so often in the past my attempt to be passionate had been blocked before it had been born.

We will never fully recover that dynamic, though we are much much better. I know that she likes to be in control, that's why this d/s lifestyle suits us so well. She admits that she would not want the same with me as with him, because he is new, and because he is only with her sometimes. She can walk away from it when it suits her. Her real life she wants more control over. For me the saddest thing was knowing that I will never feel comfortable being so free with her as when we met, as her boyfriend is now, all the nos have left their mark too deeply. I will be free with my own sub when I find her, but not with my wife.

And while this isn't a surprise to me, I've known these things for years and come to terms with them, hearing her be sad about it somehow made me feel ever so raw. This wound is not fully healed, I think it never will be.

Sandy speaks

2010-11-03T14:36:00.001Z

Referring to the last post about wether we can go back. I think you say it all really. You are right that the whole marriage would be affected if we tried to go back. I think the marriage would survive but might be tough going for a while, but it is a moot point really! Neither of us want to stop! It's weird though that I am enjoying vanilla elsewhere - maybe with time it will become less vanilla with him - I'm really not sure it will though.

I'm very happy with the way things are - it makes it easier to sit down and relax knowing you are happy to do the chores, I still struggle with that sometimes.

I'm worried after the weekend that it brings out too much selfishness. I don't worry any more that I am not kinky enough for you though!!! I will have to keep an eye on it to keep a reasonable balance between being in charge and getting my way with doing enough of what you need too.

She really likes chastity!

2010-11-03T00:11:00.001Z

Its an unexpected turn of events. Many years ago I got into chastity, like 15 of them. In all that time sandy has never really liked the game. She loves to tease and deny but the actual device and act of locking me away was too extreme for her. Especially in the cold light of day. So we played on occasion but never for long and her heart was never in it.

Even the last three years of an increasingly d/s based relationship did not change that.

But recently something had changed. She likes locking me up. She gets excited by it, by the denial. She chooses to use the thing more often, without prompting by me. Yesterday I sent her a picture of me in my neosteel and she actually told me it was a sexy picture.

The final straw came to me today. She is going away in two weeks for a girls weekend. She realised that since I am only allowed to cum at the weekend that I would miss out my weekly orgasm. This entertained her. She further thought that since I will be very horny and might be tempted to play a bit too much that she wants me locked the whole weekend. So starting Friday until late Sunday I am on lockup. Once I realised she was not just saying it, once I saw the determined and excited look in her face, I finally clicked that her relationship with chastity has changed. I suspect once the piercing has healed I will spend much more time locked than in the past.

Funny really, I gave up on the fantasy some years ago as it seemed to be not for us, and its taking a while to get used to the idea again, I like touching my cock! But then I like being a sub more. Seeing her determination made me warm inside and very hard down below.

Can we ever go back?

2010-11-02T09:30:00.004Z

I have often wondered about this question and certain conversations recently on the chastity forums have got me thinking again. I think for us the answer is no, we could not.

This has been a long slow progression to where we are today. Lots of stops and reversals along the way since I introduced kink to our life. For most of the time I was the dominant one, both day to day and in the bedroom. Once we started switching roles it was still a game. Sandy wasnt sure she enjoyed it much for some years, and didnt think she was comfortable in the dominant role. So it remained a game, she liked aspects of it, tickling and teasing, but mostly it remained something we did now and then for fun.

Three years ago that changed. The reasons I wont go into here, but they were changes in my wife that were not only related to kink but to her whole life. She discovered parts of herself she had not known existed and became pretty quickly comfortable letting herself go. This included in the bedroom, with kink generally, and with her dominance also. She blossomed. With it our marriage also blossomed, and at the same time I made many changes in my interaction with her to support and care for her more. In time this has all got tied up with the d/s life we now lead.

She loves being in control, in and out of the bedroom. Its 24/7 but not in the total power exchange sense. We speak as equals, I will stand up when I feel strongly about things. But what works for her is that she knows that if she gives me that look, if she tells me to go do, I will do it. Quickly. She can stop me in my tracks and redirect me. She can offload her work on to me and while she still occasionally feels bad about it, especially when im tired too, knows that I will do it, because she wants it, because she needs to relax, because I love her and want her to be able to relax the stresses in her mind and offload them, on to me if necessary. These things make her feel loved, supported, and the control aspect makes her feel powerful and completely worshipped. Its fun, loving, caring, exciting and even a bit mean at times. Yes she has a mean streak and loves to let it out, many interactions between us now involve something a bit teasing or mean. A shadow of a kiss that doesnt quite connect leaving me gasping for her, a smack on the arse or a pinch of the nipple, her sliding her clothes from her body seductively at night knowing I am transfixed, and knowing she has denied me orgasm. A tickle before bedtime. These are also constants in our life now.

There is also a great deal of vanilla love, hugs, kisses, from the outside you would not see any of the d/s. But we know the edge that lies beneath it always.

Whats in it for me? Well Im submissive, more so than I used to realise. Its such a sexual thrill seeing the disparity between us, seeing her getting more sex than me, asking, no lets be honest sometimes ordering me to do certain chores while she sits and reads her book. Handing me her empty plate with a haughty air for me to take to the dishwasher (with a touch of a tongue in cheek smile). She is a buzzy woman who finds it hard to relax, i have spent years trying to help her do it. So I get fulfilled knowing this lifestyle has empowered her to relax more often without guilt, and I also benefit later that day from a happier more relaxed partner. I feel like I have looked out for her. Any man with a protective nurtering nature will know how much it means to protect the woman you love from lifes troubles, and I often feel that sense strongly.

And the sex... Its fantastic. She has it turns out a hell of a sadistic streak, and I have a hell of a masochistic one. We click in the bedroom and are always exploring old games, and occasionally new ones. She can be very mean, more so than I would always want, which of course feeds the submissive in me because I am having my limits pushed, and encourages her dominance to grow also, which makes her feel free, but also paradoxically makes her feel loved.

Notice how often I have mentioned love and care. And thats the rub. This lifestyle has brought out a level of love and caring for each other that we never had consistently before. We had flashes of it but we never knew how to sustain it. This way of interacting, these roles we have taken on provide a framework for interaction that encodes within it those things we both value as our own love language. It has also brought a fantastic sex life and an outlet for her dominant nature and my submissive side. Last but not least it has given her, in her own head, permission to break free her inner passion.

In the last three years we have forgotten how to be vanilla. Now and then we have a break for a change, but we dont know what to do. How to interact day to day, how to have sex. Its a lovely change but thats all it is, a break. I never quite shake off being her sub, she never quite shakes off her teasing nature. In bed we have to work hard to stay vanilla as we keep sliding back into our d/s roles. Partly this is habit, but mostly it is that this is now who we are. As Thumper said in his post stacks, this has now become one of the most solid foundations of our marriage.

It took a long time to get here, but I firmly believe that to go back now would be almost impossible and furthermore would risk the very marriage itself. As Sandy herself says (and it warms me to hear it), she doesnt see herself as sometimes wife or sometimes mistress, there is no longer a distinction, she is both. And same on my side for me. Its beautiful.

--------------------------

One little side note. I revealed our lifestyle to a very close vanilla friend of mine recently. He was curious as to why we were so much happier these days, and I know him so well that if I cant tell him it would feel like a lie between us. I trust him. So I told him the whole story (without the gory details!!!).

Surprisingly he almost completely understood. He did wonder how being told to do stuff regularly didnt make me get rebellious, but kind of understood that it met my need to care for my wife. I asked him if he had noticed anything between Sandy and I earlier in the evening (she had left by this time) and he said no. All he had seen was a couple in love who interact lovingly and touch each other a lot in passing. He had not noticed, even once I pointed it out, the occasional look she had used on me, the teasing one, or the do this now or else one. Open air dominance and submission yet even a close friend had no inkling anything was going on. Sandy and I find that very entertaining.

Never look back

2010-11-01T20:05:00.002Z

My wife is not one for looking back. She moves forward in life, rarely has regrets and gets on with it. She would not want to live in a city she previously lived in, or work at a place she has been before. You get the drift. When it comes to kink however she was always trying to backtrack. She would have some fun, then her repression and discomfort would rise up and she would run away. This cycle (repeated often) was our pattern for many years. As a result the new, passionate, dominant and excitable Sandy is still often a surprise to me. She is honestly a different woman.

So it is still a very pleasant surprise to me when she tells me certain things. Her boyfriend is very vanilla. She told me that she quite enjoys having vanilla with him and kink at home. She says we cant do proper vanilla any more, it feels like a game. Its just not us any more and probably never will be. She is right. We have the odd vanilla break but its not real vanilla, we don't fit those roles any more. Just as many people occasionally play bondage games in the bedroom, so we play vanilla games now and then. But what's the significance?

Well imagine my surprise and pleasure when she told me that much as she likes a bit of vanilla, its made her realise that she could not imagine living that way again. Its just too boring!

We have suspected for a while this is the case but to have it confirmed is cool.

------

I have often mentioned her repression and how much she has blossomed recently. Imagine a woman who during her Ph.D. would walk past a coffee shop every day for 6 months. Every day she would look in and really want a coffee or one of their cakes. She never went in, not one single time. She still remembers the place and how good the coffee smelt. Why did she never go in? Because she was going to work, that was her mission. Because it costs money and she was a student. Because because because... So many reasons. Of course she could have had one now and then but at the time the chains her mind was bound with were so strong it never occurred to her.

Many many years later and after losing her job and having problems with the marriage she started to make a concerted effort to free herself from her own limitations. She went on a few NLP courses, practised letting herself go and thinking differently. We started to play dominance games and that also helped as she started to free herself from needing to mould herself to me. Eventually she reached the point she is at now, her inner passionate, silly, fun and loving nature is out there and its wonderful to see. She wont walk passed that coffee shop again without at least considering walking in. She is a different woman. Or rather she is the inner woman she always should have been.

---------------

This new passionate wife is still compared to some people quite reserved. Compared to me or her boyfriend for example, we are both very emotional, very excitable and loving men. He has commented on how little she shows her emotions. Haha! This is fantastic now, try living with her 10 years ago mate!

Very quick sexy update

2010-10-31T13:18:00.004Z

I am out of time. Need to get on so this will be brief.

Woke up and played. Sandy started to tease me about what she and her boyfriend had got up to. That got me worked up pretty damn quickly, but it did her too! She told me how good he feels inside her, how she loves the feeling of being filled with him, having him thrusting into her. As she said this she was thrusting herself against me. Suddenly she had an idea and got me in between her legs, rubbing her pussy against my cock and teasing me about how good it would feel if only I were allowed to fuck her, the way he had been. She wouldn't let me penetrate her but I could feel her heat and soaking wetness. She teased herself and me with her wet pussy. I was begging to be allowed in and she loved saying no, it was turning her on hugely to deny me. I was craving her pussy so badly, for a while I was very close very quickly!

But... to cut a long story short by the time she got totally worked up she was playing with her clit, the tip of my penis against her, and cheeky sub that I am I pushed a tiny bit in. She loved it and that was that, within a few minutes I was balls deep in her hot pussy, she was arching her back and thrusting back at me as she rubbed her clit and gave herself a very big orgasm, me thrusting deep inside. It was heavenly. Of course once she came I was pushed right out :)

Then a second orgasm by my hand.

Then she pulled me on to her again and pressing my cock head against her clit she rubbed herself to a third orgasm, this time just the tip of my cock inside her, me flexing to make my head grow and stretch her as she came.

And finally a couple of thrusts and she pulled me out and let me cum all over her bare pussy and soft tummy.

Lol! So much for the pussy ban, but we sure enjoyed it!

Problems and consequences

2010-10-31T11:45:00.002Z

Inevitably problems have reared their head. There are quite a few factors that have come into play and caused this, and Sandy and I had a very nasty few days with lots of arguments. Now sorted, I think.

Historically we used to have problems with Sandy spending quality time with me, in that she didnt and we were growing apart. Its something I am sensitive about. She also has a very hot temper and when under stress it can come out. When its out its really bad! Over the last few months with her being back at work and us socialising more as the kids grow up she has found herself more tired and stressed, even with the extra load I have taken on. This has meant a nasty argument about once a month. She sings in a choral society twice a week, plays piano, now also sees her boyfriend once a week, and of course we see normal friends. Doesn't leave a lot of time in the evening once kids are thrown into the equation. Our already somewhat limited time has been put under more pressure.

Trying to work with that we have been more proactive about arranging time with each other, but so far its not worked. Sometimes she is tired, exacerbated by her other interests. Sometimes she has been more focussed on texting the new guy rather than focussing on us. Up to a point this is natural, its new and exciting, but a balance needs to be struck and it hadn't been. Finally as she is still a bit shy about it she tends to talk a lot about him in non-sexual aspects, but the fun stuff she has tended to keep to herself. Since this is something we are doing together its become a bit less together as a result. He has also fallen for her, and though I know he isnt a threat the emotion he has developed has triggered a touch of jealousy on my part, which I am working through.

The lack of time and togetherness preceedes the boyfriend by a long way. This hiccup is 70% work and life and our history, and 30% the extra pressure related to him. Though I concede that it was perhaps the trigger on an already time pressured week.

Cue a few days on very nasty arguments. Actually two very simple issues related to managing the above, that could easily have been sorted out had her stress and temper not caused it to get out of hand. Its taken a good three days to cool off and talk through enough of it to make headway. The solution is fairly simple, make more effort to spend quality time with each other. Sandy is considering dropping one of her singing groups to make more time for herself as she feels she needs to relax more. Finally she had not realised that she hadnt been telling me enough about her and the guy, and admitted that in the cold light of day she is too shy to get into any detail. So she agreed that sometimes when we play she will tell me more and tease me. Not that it was hard to get her to agree, she loves to tease me about it and did often when we were just thinking of getting into this. So effectively she is remembering to do something she loves.

Finally of course a little more communication between us while I get used to the idea that while this isnt a threat to us, there is more emotion than we expected. That takes getting used to.

I am very grateful to three fellow bloggers for advice that helped. Mistress Milliscent who advised that this takes adjustment, and one who will remain anonymous (if you are reading you know who you are) who told me about his own experience and the need for communication, and Heels who similarly gave me her experience. Thanks to you guys I was careful to talk about these issues before they had become too big to deal with.

So we are back in a good place, and soon i will write about the next time we had sex :)

ps. In case it seems that she is at fault and I am not, I also have a very hot temper, and while I did not start these arguments, once they flared I was no saint!

pps. I missed my deadline for shaving myself because of the above. I remembered but was too fired up to do it. I have been told to expect a punishment for taking too long. This makes me feel happy, loved and forgiven. Strange I know but its reaffirming that we are happy, that I am her sub and she loves me enough to want it.

Unbound

2010-10-31T11:39:00.003Z

I got woken up at about 12:30 by footsteps running down the garden to the summer house. A flushed and relaxed but tired looking Sandy came in smiling, sat on the bed and began to untie me. She told me that she had had fun, and that it had taken her a while to get him home as he was very comfortable lying around.

Once back in bed she made her need very clear. She had not cum and after making me go down on her and lick her pussy, the pussy he had been inside (she was very clear about why she was making me go there), she took my hand and put it between her legs. I know what to do! I teased her and played with her, backing off several times until she cried out in frustration 'just fucking do it'. Soon after that I took her over the edge in a very powerful orgasm. She was much louder than usual and it lasted a long long time. The aftershocks probably lasted a minute or more. Not long after that a second orgasm, and then she told me in her domme voice that she was tired and we were going to sleep.

I went to sleep frustrated, horny, and with my cock nestled against her soft pert ass, and my arms around the woman I love.

Bound cuck

2010-10-26T20:22:00.001+01:00

I am currently lying tied up and belted in our summer house while Sandy entertains her lover in our bedroom. This is where i will spend my evening, bound curled up in a ball. She on the other hand has dinner and then sex.

We had great fun tying me up and getting her ready! Was a right giggle.

Safe sane and consensual. There is a weak link in the bindings that I can snap in an emergency and then free the rest of myself so don't worry. Of course if it isn't an emergency this will be punished.

----

Update. Almost four hours bound. I've always wanted to try long period bondage. It's a peaceful feeling. You just have to stop and let your body and mind relax. Nothing else to do! Except use this phone of course :) I am starting to feel a little cramp now, but it's coming and going. Time to stop soon i suspect.

Oh and I could just see into the house while they ate. After dinner she sat in his lap facing him for a while making out, her sexy legs and bare feet swinging and when she leant back her breasts jutting out. Dressed. She looked the sexiest! And (you may laugh) but she's mine. How lucky am I!

Collared

2010-10-25T23:09:00.001+01:00

Yesterday i received my birthday present. A black leather collar. And lead!

Apparently Sandy finds the collar very sexy on me. I ended up wearing it all evening, rubbed body lotion into her whole body as she lay naked watching tv. I got to kneel between her legs and go down on her for a while, then had a long slow tease ending in a powerful orgasm for me. A loving one with my wife in my arms kissing me and telling me she loved me.

I felt my heart burst with love last night.

Nb. I have been told that I am never to remove the collar, only she can. How perfectly right that feels.

M

Birthday card

2010-10-21T08:32:00.000+01:00

For my birthday sandy sent me a lovely card saying that we had had our best year yet. This felt great to hear. She also signed it off with her mistress name, used on her ic profile. The gooey subby feeling as I read it was overwhelming. She said later that she did it because its now so much part of who we are, and that she thinks it has significantly contributed to our happiness.

Saturday night dancing

2010-10-20T19:09:00.000+01:00

Saturday night she was out with her lover at a trendy london club, one of those places that celebs and footballers go. It seems he knows the owner there. I spent saturday evening pleasuring her, lying in bed with my cock in her hand edging me while I brought her to the brink of orgasm several times. She did not allow me to make her cum though, she is enjoying denying me that and wants to save it for him (not that he has managed to make her cum yet, ha!). After that I made her a gin and tonic (she demanded one) and was then on my knees naked holding her drink while she got dressed. I was allowed to kiss her feet several times and her freshly shaved pussy once or twice, but mainly I admired her beautiful form as she dressed, occasionally holding her drink up to her when she needed it and taking it from her outstretched hand when she was done. No please or thank you was said, she just looked imperiously at me as she did it. I was totally in my place on my knees and she totally loved seeing me there. Part way through I was ordered to put on my chastity belt before kneeling back down with her drink in hand. She ended up wearing black patent high heels, sheer black tights, very short very tight pinstrip skirt and a slightly see through sparkly black top with bare arms. Deep red lips and dark eyes.

In an aside while looking for her coat she found the harness for our strap on which we thought we had lost. Fantastic. I noted that she could use it on me soon and her eyes lit right up. Its been a while since she has fucked me and it seems she has missed it.

Before she left the house we made out, she was grinding her crotch into the front plate of my belt, teasing my mouth by fucking it with her tongue and breathing heavily into me. I had her firm butt in my hands which was barely contained by her skirt. It was obvious I was melting with lust and desire for her and equally obvious she was utterly enjoying herself. I kissed her a final goodbye, dropped to my knees and kissed each of her feet, the last thing I kissed before she left the house to meet the other man.

Further update after the visit...

Sandy was tired before she went out and did not want a late night, nor did she want to go to his place afterwards. I was expecting her home by 2:30 at the latest. I had said it was fine if she wanted to go out later but to text me so I didn't worry. She said she would.

I worked till about one then went to bed. Woke at 2:30, just by chance not by design and checked the time and for messages. Nothing, but that's fine. A little while later texted her to see if she was having a nice time. More of a gentle check up. No reply but I knew in the club she wouldn't have her phone, so I started worrying a bit but told myself I shouldn't. After another hour I was so concerned I sent another text asking if she was OK. I got a reply a few minutes later but it was very cryptic and did little to ease my mind. I asked what she meant. No reply. Now I was really worried but I didn't want to disturb her when she is probably fine and I am just being silly. I couldn't shake it off though. At four I texted one last time and when I got no reply I decided it was enough and called her, getting through on the second attempt only, more worry. She said she was OK and on her way home and my heart stopped beating quite so fast.

I was so damned worried, I wondered if I had overreacted but thinking about it later I realised that so many things had not added up that I was right to. Even her odd reply which it turns out had been her trying, while receiving oral, to tell me she had cum twice. Lovely idea crap execution. It was so odd I wondered if someone else had her phone.

She was very apologetic. We hugged, she told me she loved me and a bit about her night before she went to sleep. I slept badly and my dreams were full of anger at her. My subconcious was telling me something that I hadn't realised while awake. I was angry with her for scaring me.

Next day we talked about it, she agreed she had been very silly not to get in touch and had between swept up in the moment. She agreed I had good reason to worry and did not want me not to check up on her as she liked the security net. We agreed on a sign in her texts to show she is OK and it really is her, and she will be more careful next time.

Panic over, but by god it scared me.

Anyway she had a really good time but my own experience was rather overshadowed.

Sex amongst equals

2010-10-19T07:22:00.000+01:00

Sandy likes to highlight the difference. With her lover she has sex as an equal. She lets him fuck her and encourages him to be rough with her. I am her sub and sex between us is almost entirely a d/s dynamic. With me she is in charge in bed, even when temporarily she gives away a little power. She has admitted that she spent a long time teaching me to be gentle, and now with him remembers the pleasure of someone being rough with her. She says it almost to tease me because she doesn't want me to change, she gets submissive kinky sex at home with me, and now and then gets sex with an equal, fucking, and not being dominant with her lover. The best of both worlds. What is more she enjoys the disparity, her husband is sexually her sub, her lover is her equal. These are her words.

She has also admitted that its reminded her why we are kinky. Once a week or so of vanilla fucking is fun especially with someone new, but she has said she needs much more than that. Her lover is not especially kinky and she told me would get bored if that is all she had. Again this works for her, she gets both vanilla from him and kink and d/s from me.

Mind you her lover has noticed that she is quite a dominant woman and it appears that he might have a bit of a submissive streak himself. He has asked her a couple of times to dominate him and she has declined. She says it is partly because she doesn't know him well enough to do it well, but mainly because she has that with me and prefers her lover to be equal or even a touch dominant with her. Poor bloke. If he really does have a submissive streak it must be hard to be so close to having your fix but not getting it. I suggested to her that she should tell him about our dynamic otherwise he doesn't understand part of what makes her tick.

For myself I kind of like it that my submission to her is valuable precisely because it's coming from the man she loves, and I like to think she doesn't want that with anyone else. She says don't kid myself:) she values it from me but doesn't want it with him mainly because she wants a change.

She does not think that having a lover is a lifestyle for her. She thinks that after this it may not happen again. I find that amusing, she had thoughts like that about so many things in the past. She does not always realise how much these things grow to be part of her. She gets dominance at home but vanilla sex with an equal away. She has all the fun of a new relationship and the excitement of the taboo, while having a loving husband and safe home life. She enjoys the fantasy. Most of all she has broken that taboo once and knows that it has not harmed us, quite the opposite. Once you've done it once the second time is much easier. So I doubt this is the only time, because one day whether a year of 5 from now when a cute guy she likes shows an interest in her and she knows her husband wont mind and her relationship will only benefit, whats the chance of her saying no?

M

Chastity conversation with a normal friend

2010-10-18T09:00:00.001+01:00

I have a good friend, she is a lovely girl and we get on very well. She and I even had a couple of very minor dalliances in the past. She isn't especially naughty, she is naughty in the way openminded vanilla folk are. Plays a bit with dressing up and silk ties to the bedposts.

She came with me when I got my piercing, mainly because we happened to be having lunch beforehand.

A few days ago over lunch she asked if she could see a picture of it. I showed her the one on this blog, which she liked. She asked me why I had done it. I told her partly because I liked it, but then throwing caution to the wind told her it was also so I could wear a chastity belt. She caught on very quick and to my surprise loved the idea of holding the key. 'The fun I could have teasing you' she said.

At times like that I wish I were single!

M

Rules I live by

2010-10-18T09:00:00.000+01:00

I have mentioned that we are living more and more in a 24/7 d/s relationship, albeit not a particularly extreme one. As part of that I have a set of rules I need to keep to. I have added a page keeping them up to date, the link is at the top of my blog, or you can get to it here.

Big Boy

2010-10-16T14:23:00.003+01:00

Apparently he is a big boy. This is what my wife coyly said to me after the last night they were together. Very big apparently, but she loves the way he feels inside. She really likes that he is big.

They both wish they could avoid condoms since they both prefer the way it feels, but since he is fairly promiscuous Sandy has decided that it wont happen with him. This is kind of a shame as she really gets off on the idea of him cumming inside her, of feeling his cum dripping down her thighs after. She is totally turned on by coming home and making me lick her clean afterwards, she talks about it as a certainty that it would happen. I'm glad safety takes precedence though. Perhaps one day we will get to experience that but for now it remains a fantasy.

Funnily enough she doesnt think he feels better inside her than I do. I wonder what will happen when she next fucks me though, as its been two months since we last did, and it will be a long while before we do again. I wonder if the difference will be more noticeable then. I suspect not but its an interesting thought. The fantasy of course is that she prefers him, but the reality is that she and I are very sexually compatible and she loves sex with me. This is a good thing, though we often play with the fantasy of the better lover. She enjoys calling me dicklet and I get off on playing up to it. We both know its not true, if I really weren't comfortable with my cock I dont think a comment as barbed as that would be fun in the slightest, but as it is it works in a tongue in cheek kind of way.

There are some extreme aspects to this cuck play though. The first is that she clearly has emotions for him. Not romantic love but she likes him and cares about him. This isn't a risk to us, he's not a man she could be with in a relationship, but she cares a lot nonetheless and misses him. I am finding my feet with the reality of this lifestyle, seeing a bit less of her, knowing her emotions are shared. It takes a bit of getting used to. Not a lot, i have total trust in her and we are still more in love than ever before, but logical knowledge that this is ok is not the same as emotionally feeling it. I feel good about it, as does she, but every now and then I am keenly aware of my feelings about the whole subject. Its like a chastity belt, permanent bondage it reminds you each time you feel it that your partner has you at her mercy. Well each time I remember what she has done and is still doing, each time I see a text or her smile when she talks about him, its like a little submissive lurch inside me and another level of excitement and submission that i am drawn into.

This is turning into a long long post. That wasn't what I intended. I don't often get to write on a pc, usually I'm on the iphone and have to keep them shorter. Its good to dump my thoughts down though.

She and I are getting deeper into a d/s relationship. One effect of this is that I am getting more submissive to her, so much so that I want her to take the cuckolding decision away from me. At the moment I know she will stop the instant I say, she has been very clear about that with me. I really appreciate that but I really want her to be the only one to make that decision, to fuck who she wants without asking permission, to stop only when she chooses. Here is where fantasy and reality clash of course. It would be insane for us to actually take that step. She never would, not just the risk to our relationship but simply that loving and caring for me as she does makes it impossible for her to ignore my hurt and carry on if I needed her to stop. As for me I am not slave material I cant delegate our entire life to her, I need intimacy and need her love and respect. I am comfortable precisely because I know that if things became hard she would put me first. The fantasy of being utterly submissive in this regard is deeply appealing to my submissive side but totally impractical in reality.

There is however an area in which we are both comfortable handing over total control to her, an area which feeds my submission and her dominance, and takes some advantage of the cuckold dynamic. Permission to fuck my own wife. She isn't usually much into penetrative sex so we don't do it often and its been up to her for a long time now. Occasionally we have a vanilla break but the rest of the time its her call. Of course now she is getting a regular, almost weekly fuck from her lover its pretty much met her need for that kind of sex. She loves denying me anyway and is now very excited by denying me her pussy, not just a fuck but even momentary entry, while offering it to him freely. She gets a fuck with a nice guy with a big cock, she gets the added pleasure of the naughtiness of not allowing her own husband the same pleasure. It turns her on to think of me being denied while she breaks the ultimate taboo. It turns me on too. Sandy decided a couple of weeks back that I was banned for a while, yesterday I encouraged her to put a timescale on it.

2011. I wont be allowed inside her until 1 Jan 2011. Not once, not even for a moment. Her pussy is out of bounds. What is more she has said that she is seriously considering making this a permanent ban as long as she is seeing her lover, since she loves being that mean to me and is getting her fill anyway. Remember that she does not expect this to last very long, a year at most, so the ban is not as bad as it sounds. If it lasts long term she has been pretty clear that she will want me inside her on occasion, but only rarely. Hence on the 1st of Jan she will decide if I can fuck her again, or if the ban gets extended.

Going back to the earlier point, we cant let her decide alone wether to keep fucking her lover, but we can make my fucking her part of the power exchange. We decided over the last few days that it is now entirely up to her when or even if I get to fuck her. She can extend the ban a day, a week, a year with a veto over anything I request. This will apply even when we are having a vanilla break. Its not so different to our normal life of the last three years but its become more solid, even less negotiable. Any pretence I had of access to my wife for a fuck has been laid to rest. I can honestly say that I love it, knowing I am completely at her whim for her pussy makes me burn for her and my submission grow, and she just loves the power.

This is a fairly extreme post I realise. I am very interested to know your thoughts so for those of you reading, if you have an opinion I would be grateful to hear it.

M

Picture that piercing

2010-10-13T23:40:00.001+01:00

So here it is, as requested. I like it! Very glad I did it.

Sitting working, cant do much else when locked!

2010-10-13T21:37:00.002+01:00

Im being very productive tonight. Done an etra 2 hours of work so far and still going. Cant do much else with my cock locked up.

Yes its what has become Sandy's weekly visit to her lover. She didnt expect to want to go this often but she is having fun. Im sure sooner or later it will settle down to more like once or twice a month but for now once a week a very wet and horny Sandy leaves a very horny hubby locked up at home while she goes to have fun, see her friend, and sometimes get a large cock.

Where?

In her own words from a text she sent him

'In my hand, my mouth, and my pussy. Im very wet.'

Coming to America!

2010-10-12T21:05:00.001+01:00

I might be coming to New York soon on business. Anyone want a visit?

I mentioned to sandy that I might be traveling for a few days soon. Her first half joking comment was about having her lover over. Her second totally serious one was about locking me in the new chastity belt, the Pa-5000 while I'm gone. She is a bad but fun puppy.

Yes that might be possible. I went up a gauge today, to the thickness of the pa-5000 ring. Another month to get used to it and I might just be on a traveling lock up.

My god it hurt. It hurt much more than the piercing itself. We had to stop halfway for me to get used to it and at that point the thick end looked very thick indeed! But it got done and its fine now, just a bit tender.

M

Cuckold coaster ride

2010-10-12T20:56:00.001+01:00

You know how once you are on a roller coaster there is no getting off? Or maybe you have read about guys who offer to let their wives play away, and once that door is open she loves it too much to close it again. Well that's me now.

She basically said that she thinks she is enjoying this game more than me and is glad i encouraged her to do it.

I don't know about more but the comment shows how much she likes it. This isn't about to stop.

M

Playtime at last

2010-10-11T21:43:00.002+01:00

Sandy and i finally had our long overdue playtime last night. She stripped naked, she has recently shaved so the alabaster color of her skin extends unbroken from neck to feet, a beautiful sight. She then put on a pair of very high spiked heels, from this post. This is a first, usually I ask her to dress up. It felt very sexy kneeling at her feet, sexy heels at eye level and looking up at her statuesque body, Shaven pussy, pert breasts and lovely smile. She was already having fun, she has really missed playtime with me and her dominant itch needed scratching. Unsurprisingly she went straight for her riding crop, and laid into my arse for probably twenty minutes straight. She alternate hard with very hard, light taps but fast and stingy, really hard deep strokes. She forced me to keep my chest down and arse up even during the hardest strokes, grinding her heel on to my back, using her weight and the sharp point of the heel to force my body to the floor. She made me put my head to the ground and kiss her feet as she whipped me, taunting me that I was being a wuss and could take more, that I was out of practice even as she upped the intensity.

I will always remember being made to worship her feet in the heels while she stood in front of me, whipping the crop into my arse crack repeatedly hitting my hole, making it sting and burn, while admonishing me not to slobber on her feet and ruin her shoes. I wasn't of course but she liked humiliating and taunting me. She was well into the mood. Later she crouched behind me so I could see her pussy pouting as I looked back between my legs, then started whipping my balls knowing I did not want to pull away and lose the view.

A short bout of tickling followed, short but intense, then she ordered me to insert our largest butt plug, she wanted me plugged as she peed all over me. She was dead pleased with the idea. Since she wasn't ready yet she ordered me to remain on all fours on the floor at the foot of the bed, plugged and facing away from her while she relaxed for a while texting her lover and admiring my arse. I wasn't allowed to look at her. I must have been there for ten minutes and asked to look at her several times before being allowed to turn. When finally I was allowed to turn i found her lying on her side with her curves enhanced by her position, her diamond between her legs visible and her finger idly tracing over her arse and lips. Every now and then she would peek over at me and smile. I wasn't allowed to touch, I must have spent another thirty minutes kneeling there drooling wanting needing, and being denied. Two or three times I couldn't help myself and jumped on to the bed, hugging her and rubbing myself into her. Each time she started counting fast until I got back on my knees, then whipped me hard that many strokes to teach me my place. The last time I buried my face in her very wet cunt and tasted and drank her until she reached forty, I couldn't drag myself away. Mercifully only twenty of the strokes were hard but she was almost squeeling with fun as I squirmed to escape the crop.

Finally unable to stand the sight of the feast I pulled her down the bed a little way, staying on my knees I buried my head in her thighs and began to gently lick her, very gently, keeping her relaxed mood, I spent twenty minutes just gently pleasuring her and tasting her. For a girly who doesn't usually like oral this was unusual, but she found it very relaxing being very lightly played and licked while texting.

Sadly that's where it ended as my daughter chose that time to be sick in her sleep...

By the time we finished up it was late and sandy was tired, but she did need a pee. So one last little play as she ordered me into the bath, stood over me with her legs spread and let flow over my face and body. She always enjoys the dirtyness of it, and the enjoyment I get from it.

And there it ends. A lot of fun, no orgasms.

Mi esposa es tu chica

2010-10-10T20:53:00.003+01:00

So is she or isnt she? Am I or arent I?

Good lord that was a strange night! She went over there with a slight cold and I thought she might just be in the mood to chill and chat. Before she left she insisted I lock myself up, as I said in my last post, and she got dressed, so it was obvious something might happen.

I sat at home, tidied up, did some chores, wrote a post, watched some porn (yes cheating wife porn), wished I could touch myself. Then realising that porn without any stimulation is quite dull I watched some TV. Turned off the light, closed my eyes, imagined what might be going on and then imagined it some more. At that point the steel tube on my neosteel split and my raging member escaped, homing in on the nearest woman like a missile. That last part sadly didnt happen by the way.

I had a text exchange with her just after she got there where she said this game was fun!!!

I was at first just relaxing but as the time went by and it was almost midnight it became obvious that she would have been home by then if nothing was going on. That got my imagination racing and suddenly it became very hard to focus on anything else. I wasnt sure quite how I felt, there were no negative emotions, no jelousy or fear, but a strange mix of lust, submission, curiosity, and happiness for her. I was very horny, but by midnight I was falling asleep. I dozed probably for only 5 minutes before she got home. After pottering downstairs for a few minutes she came up to bed, smiled and slunk over the bed still fully dressed. She was very amorous and looked at me with lust drunken eyes, saying huskily 'i've been very naughty...'

Oh God, I did burst! She had done it, enjoyed it, and was here telling me that she had fucked him in a tone of voice that made it obvious she loved it. She told me a bit about the evening as she unlocked me, how they had chatted for a little while then they had undressed, how he loved her lack of panties and it had been making her tingly all evening not wearing them. How good he felt inside her and how filled she was. By this time I was teasing her soaking, dripping slit and she was getting really hot. He still hasnt been able to make her cum, my gain! She pushed my head down to her pussy making me lick her, telling me how he had been inside her pussy, asking could I taste the rubber and her juices and know, know for sure her pussy had been his. The talk was getting her off big time. In pretty short order I was on the edge from her teasing, and she had had her first orgasm. The first of three, lucky girl! And what an orgasm it was, it must have lasted over a minute. We had been fantasising as I pleasured her, and in chatting I happened to ask her if I would ever be allowed to be unlocked while she was away. I wasnt entirely surprised that the answer was no but i was surprised how strongly she felt about it. She basically said it really really turns her on to have me locked and be fucking him, knowing the state i am in, knowing i cant touch myself while I am so desperate to because of the thoughts of her. Her saying it and thinking of it had an immediate impact on her lust, her voice actually dropped deeper, her hips ground against me and I swear I felt an extra wetness flow from her as she was telling me this. I was utterly shocked and totally turned on by how much it turns her on to keep my cock locked up while she plays. In fact she ended up telling me that I am now banned from her pussy, might be only a few weeks or it might be as long as she is seeing him. The timescale is unknown but she confirmed afterwards that she was serious about denying me entry to her for a while.

She loves this game, she is stunned how much she enjoys it. She loves having another man to play with, loves the dynamic between us that is developing, and loves teasing me and denying me about it all. She keeps making little comments all throughout the day and teasing me. She is certain she will do it again with him. Funnily enough this is making us closer too, and more in love.

She did ask several times if I minded, it feels good hearing her ask even though I dont mind at all, and she needed the reassurance. She has also asked if I mind that she cares about him, by which she means as a friend who she values. Of course I dont mind, she isnt falling in love and I would almost be more concerned if she was so hard hearted as to not feel something for him. Our relationship is clearly not being harmed by it, quite the opposite.

Oh and of course I didnt get to cum, its not the weekend. Even after having so much fun she is absolutely strict about that. Damn!

Out again, the tart!

2010-10-07T20:17:00.002+01:00

So She who was sick has recovered a little. I didnt expect any sex until the weekend, let alone any possible extramarital engagement. Its been quiet on the sex front for the last week and a half with both of us having the cold. When I say quiet I mean almost non-existant. Sandy and I both felt the need to play, really properly play, last week. We had planned it for the weekend. She wanted to whip me, tickle me, she wanted to pee on my face, she was missing it. I for one needed, needed in the way only a kinky kinky sub needs it, a really good proper session of being abused and owned. Sadly the colds destroyed first me then her. No play. Actually sunday morning I teased her a little, she got very turned on while we talked about how she would feel if she actually fucked the boyfriend. She was very turned on but we both agreed for her not to cum then but to save it. If I felt up to it Sunday night we would play. If not she joked that he would get the benefit of a woman horny from a week without sex. In fact she half joked that she wouldnt let me make her cum that night either and save it all for him. In fact she said maybe she would do that often (she was joking).

In actual fact we didnt play that night, nor did she visit him on monday as she got sick herself... I thought that there would be at least a few days before anything could happen between us, and longer before she wanted to go out.

How wrong I was.

Tonight when she got home from work she looked fantastic. Business suit, crisp shirt, tan thigh highs underneath. I who havent cum for a week and a half couldnt keep my hands off her. She enjoyed the attention, and the desperate attentive state I was in amused her. She playfully, but seriously said that she intended to go and see him tonight, and did I mind. Actually I possibly did, I said im happy for her to go as long as she is feeling well, but not to push herself and have the cold bite back, its a doozy. She promised if she felt at all tired she would stay at home, but that she felt rather well.

We cuddled for a short while and chatted. I enjoyed the feel of her nearly naked body against me, she had taken off her work clothing but the thigh highs were still on. She wasnt sure if she was in a dominant mood at first but after 5 minutes sat on top and started teasing me a bit. She said she had made up her mind, she was in the mood and I was expected to lock my cock up before she went out, she didnt want me playing with myself while thinking of her adventure. She really enjoyed denying me that at a time I would be so desperate to tease myself. So I just spent the last 20 minutes watching and helping her dress. Ten inch denim mini, dark tights (hose) with no panties (her idea, she fantasised about it the other day and obviously it stuck with her), no bra, tight vest and pretty shirt. As if that wasnt enough, and my locked cock wasnt already bending steel, she bent over to get her high pointed heel black leather knee boots. First wear of the winter and its for his benefit and my tease. She knew exactly what she was doing, even looking back at me for the reaction she was fully expecting to cause.

There we are. She may not go over to his after her errands if she is feeling unwell. She may go over and just chat, but she may end up playing and I have no idea. Its driving me crazy with lust, and all that does is make her enjoy denying me more.

Analysis ---

She suggested she go see him, she pushed it, she wanted it. I didnt have to encourage her or tell her its ok at all. This is a first, its her game now. I told her she was enjoying this more than she expected she would and she wholeheartedly agreed. She admitted that she enjoys the game as much as I do, another surprise for me. It also makes her feel more dominant toward me (and more loving).

M

I am or I am into?

2010-10-05T02:12:00.001+01:00

Mistress Milliscent wrote of a difference between how an individual defines themselves from a kink perspective. Into bdsm or am bdsm. I hadn't thought of it that way before but it clarifies feeling of surprise expressed in my post about sandy being truly kinky. For many years she has been resistant to kink due to being uncomfortable, society judgement repression. Then for a number of years she began to get over that. My own model of her mind has just about kept up with her increasing comfort with kink, but only just. It is an inadequate model, I had not really allowed myself to recognise how much she has changed over the last three years. At some point she went from a women who is into bdsm, to a woman who is bdsm. No longer a hobby or pleasant diversion, she is now at a very fundamental level kinky, dominant, and even mean, though lovingly so. She admits she could not go back to how we were before, and were we to ever separate she believes she would be the same with a new man. So its not a function of us, but of her.

Her model of her own mind knows this, its just me playing catch up, and its such a big change to the sandy I knew for over a decade that I am sure I will be surprised by this again. Surprise but ever so pleased, for both of us.

I am sick

2010-10-05T01:43:00.001+01:00

I have a nasty bitch of a cold. I've been layed out for three days. I hate it, want a body transplant, and on top of that feel like I'm letting my best friend and mistress down by not helping her enough. Sandy of course says I'm being silly, I'm clearly not well. She is right but emotionally I've been teaching myself to care for her at all times. That doesn't just turn off because of illness.

One conversation in passing is worth a mention. A few weeks back when we had a vanilla break we made love, or fucked a few times. I asked her if she was missing it. She said she was a bit. This surprised me as she very rarely misses penetrative sex. So I asked (rather hopefully) if she wanted more of it, and she basically said yes but not with me. I assumed she was joking but then out of interest asked what she missed about it. It seems it's not the emotional intimacy (which is why I value it) it's simply the sensation she is missing. I guessed then that she meant it about wanting a fuck, but with her new guy rather than me, and she confirmed that.

We laughed about it, she felt a touch uncomfortable and pointed out it's just for now, it's a fun game. I smiled, since I know that already, but enjoyed teasing her about it nonetheless.

Oh and we've started occasionally calling him her boyfriend. It's meant mostly in irony, mostly but not entirely. She spends a lot of time chatting or texting in a rough simulacrum of a new relationship. It's not of course, before you get worrying. In fact we both find ourselves closer to each other than before. But it's similar enough to warrant the label.

Some realities of having a third man around

2010-10-03T17:06:00.001+01:00

As the play with the other guy progresses the reality of having another person in the scene is starting to be apparent. As so often the fantasy and the reality are not the same, and reality is harder and more nuanced.

The other guy is aware we have an open relationship, that I know everything that goes on between them. There are no real secrets between Sandy and I, nor could there be. But Sandy and I have talked and fantasised about this kind of relationship for several years and are deeply aware of what open means to us. To us it means we come first, that she loves me, respects me, fancies the pants off me. We have history, children and a future that neither of us would walk away from. I don't think he fully understands this yet. He understands open in theory yet as far as we can tell cant quite believe it. He says he wouldn't share a woman like her if they were together. Thats fine and understandable but that and similar comments show that he is far from understanding that we aren't sharing the part of her that makes us a couple in love. Its very hard to be sure because like so many men he isn't that open about feelings, but occasionally we wonder if he realises that Sandy fooling around is not in any way indicative of a flaw in our relationship.

We also know that he has become very infatuated with her. Easy to do, Sandy is an absolute gem, her personality shines bright. He is in the honeymoon stage where she can do no wrong, he hasn't seen her flaws, the aspects of her that in her own words would drive him potty and make them unsuited in the long term. He is getting rather romantic and every now and then Sandy has to back off and make the boundaries clear. Cue a slightly hurt backtrack as he says that he is a big boy and capable of looking after himself. We are sure he is, but fundamentally he seems the type to fall in 'love' easily and even if he can survive it not being reciprocated we still don't want to hurt his feelings. Its a new relationship (theirs that is) and like all new relationships it takes a bit of time to settle down and find its boundaries. We are going through that stage now. I think that if this aspect of it doesn't settle down soon Sandy will put an end to the whole thing, for his sake. The next few weeks will be key.

Due to the feelings he has for her and the fact that he just isn't comfortable with that kind of thing I need to stay off the scene. There will be no watching while tied in the corner, no listening on the end of a phone. I will be lucky to get the odd picture. Our fantasies would ideally include me more, but as so often once you start this process you don't always get quite what you wanted. So I enjoy imagining what they are up to, she enjoys telling me all about it. The rest will have to remain a fantasy. Not that this ruins the experience, its still fun, but its not the fantasy ideal.

Finally he seems to be a long way from understanding real dominance and submission. He doesn't know that we are in a d/s relationship and Sandy doesn't think she wants to tell him as she suspects he would get an incorrect impression on me. Not knowing she is dominant means that a large part of who she is nowadays is a mystery to him, and though she intends to tell him a bit about that side of her character its not something she thinks he will grok. (who remembers the term grok, does that make me a real geek?) Again this is not unexpected, it takes people years in this scene to understand the nuances of a d/s relationship, and the nuances of a dominant or submissive character. 'Vanilla' people just think of it as a sexual thing.

So all of this sounds vaguely negative. In fact apart from the possibility that his feelings for her are too strong the rest just is what it is. It needs to be worked through, and Sandy and I work with what we have.

Its a lot of fun, but lets be honest and open about the trickier aspects.

She is truly kinky!

2010-10-03T14:09:00.002+01:00

I realise that my wife is truly kinky. For so many years she resisted it that I still struggle to believe that kink isnt only driven by me anymore. If I stopped she would continue, she has been clear that she would not want to live a vanilla life again, nor stop being dominant. She said, for example, that she loves tickling me and would really struggle if asked to stop that. She went on to say sitting on my face and tickling me. I hadnt realised that facesitting had become something she liked rather than doing it just for me, but she says that sitting on my face and smothering me while tickling me just goes so well together.

As we were chatting we discussed her sleeping with another guy, and what would happen if I asked her to stop. She said that after so many years of wanting her to do this (and other kinky things) she would be miffed if I stopped her now. She would, but would have a serious chat to me first along the lines of not going hot or cold. If I say stop now thats it, there is no going back. Not that we are about to stop because chatting about it got us both very horny. She half joked about going to see him tomorrow I asked if I could help dress her if she did. She agree on condition that she locks me up first. She got very horny while we were discussing this. I was teasing her already damp slit as we spoke. She admitted that it turns her on to think of me locked up unable even to touch myself while she gets fucked by another man. Specifically it turns her on to have me locked up while she is out there having fun, knowing all I can do is think of what she is up to. She gets all the fun and i get denied. By this point she had more or less decided to go over there with a skirt, holdups and no panties or bra. She wanted him to have easy access to her. I teased her to the point of orgasm, two fingers stroking her G spot while teasing her clit, she was very very wet, unusually so. I suggested that she not cum and we save it till tonight (we hope to play later). She responded that maybe she wont let me make her cum tonight either and would rather save it for tomorrow. She likes the idea of denying me the pleasure of getting her off, and as a bonus knowing the more horny she is the more likely he is to be able to do the job.

I think at this point I realised that my wife is really, truly kinky, and has a mean domme streak a mile wide.

How long do I have to go with limited orgasms?

2010-10-02T10:08:00.003+01:00

I had a quick chat with Sandy this morning, asked her if she thinks she will ever allow me to cum more than once a week. She though for a moment and then clearly said no. She said it works for her, and for me.

That's what I wanted for so long, knowing that she wants my suffering, and she decides and gets. It is hard knowing that I will always be kept so horny though!

She did say she didn't think she would reduce it either, that she likes it this way. I am relieved by that, although I'm not convinced she wont at some point become more strict.

The three week mark, living with a prince Albert.

2010-10-01T18:52:00.001+01:00

A few days ago I reached three weeks. To recap the first week and a bit was pretty painless but messy. By late week two I had confidence that I wasn't going to bleed all over the place. By then I also had a touch of swelling, I suspect I had allowed it to get a bit dirty and picked up a very mild infection. No pain, minor discomfort, little redness. A few days of regular and thorough salt baths, ten minutes and three times a day sorted that out. I think I might have a tiny bit of swelling still but sandy believes it to be part of the normal healing process, increased blood flow to promote healing. She does have expertise in the life sciences.

At this stage it looks almost healed! So quickly, I'm used to months for a Frenum and still it wasn't perfect. This looks almost done and I think I can go up a gauge now, though I intend to give it one more week for extra confidence.

I love it, its sexy, feels nice, I love the subtle weight of it dangling and like seeing it there. The anarchist in me revels in my moment of counter culture subversion. Suit on the outside maybe but I'm still me somewhere in there.

I can pee!!! It takes care to line it up and put pressure on my head just so, I need to spread my legs wide just in case and stand very close to the urinal, but I can do it! Excellent news as I do like to go to the pub.
I am as the advert says lovin' it.

Is the third man a cuck?

2010-09-30T23:14:00.001+01:00

A couple of comments on my last post got me thinking.

Is the third man a cuck? What is his position, what can he expect, what do we owe him?

Seems a silly question given that by inviting him in the married couple are putting their marriage at risk, but the third wheel has feelings too. Anonymous suggested that if he were to fall in love the couple should and probably would walk away. He is left behind, and is therefore in some way a cuckold. I'm not sure that I can stretch the definition of the word that far but I know what he means. It's easy to forget his feelings, we are used to believing that men want sex, that they can separate emotions from sex easily. That therefore the new guy should be happy to get some pussy and his feelings don't count. I'm not sure that's fair, I know that there will be men who get drawn in further than they expected and get hurt.

Sadly that's a risk that is hard to avoid, but sandy and I are certainly aware and looking out for his feelings, I know sandy is fantastic and very easy to fall for, in our case the risk of his being hurt is greater than that of us.

But he still isn't a cuck.

I'm not sure that many women would want
power over both men in those circumstances though. It feels to me too close to a hurtful situation to make it fun or intoxicating.

Why does she cuckold her man?

2010-09-29T14:21:00.006+01:00

Ive read Dev's thoughts on cuckolding which inspired me to write a short post about what we are getting out of it. I should say at the start that I am as irritated by the close link between chastity, cuckolding, and im a useless worm style fantasy. Especially when that fantasy is made out to be real. The end result is that a person, usually a woman coming online to research this thing they have been asked to play with, finds a lot of scary, extreme and emotionally upsetting claptrap. In that I agree with her, Tom, Maymay, Sarah, Thumper and many others who reject the association between kink, submission and weakness. I admit also that cuckolding is an extreme fantasy, one of the most extreme, simply because society for thousands of years has taught us that almost the worst thing we can do in a relationship is to play away, because a woman wants to love and respect her man and not do anything to threaten that, and because it seems very risky and it can be!

That said this post is going to address why we do it, in the context of a healthy happy loving marriage.

I wish I could start by writing a long post on my thoughts, one that would address everything perfectly, clarify my and Sandys thoughts and emotions perfectly, make clear how we feel. Sadly ive been beaten to the punch by queen KC who wrote a post that so perfectly summarises it that im just going to link to it and not try to reinvent the wheel badly. Please read this before you carry on. I emailed this to Sandy. My wife is put off by extreme fantasy or badly written silliness. She is very open minded but as any long time reader of my blog knows she struggled to embrace her and my kinky side for many years. Yet her response to the article was 'Sounds just like us!'. KC summarises it perfectly. Sandy loves me, fancies me, respects and admires me. She finds me gentle and loving, smart and dependable, and sexy as hell even after 15 years together. One reason she hasnt even considered played with anyone else before is because for her I set a very high bar. Why bother to play with someone who is so much less attractive. But having found someone who does appeal (physically and friendship wise, NOT emotionally) she has very much enjoyed playing away so far.

She likes to humiliate me, I enjoy it too. This wouldnt work if it was true that I was useless, it works because it is a game. Sure im embarrassed but I know im not really 'dicklet', in fact I know she loves my cock a lot. I find it hard to strip off and show myself to her while wearing her panties because I know and she knows I look ridiculous. Yet she loves the fact that I do it as it shows the power she has over me, she cant believe I do what she says but gets off on it. Humiliation is one way to amplify that feeling. Plus its just FUN!

For now she enjoys playing away. All this fun we have at home makes her horny. She isnt going and spending that energy elsewhere, this isnt a zero sum game. Playing and flirting with him makes her more horny, the amount of sex we have has gone up since she started doing this. The intimacy between us has gone up even more, we are sharing a naughty secret. We laugh about it, fantasise and talk about it. Its one more thing to share and therefore brings us together. When I look at her I see a woman I love and lust after through my eyes and his, she becomes even more attractive to me. When she comes home to me she is reminded every time of how lucky she is, how much she truly appreciates and wants me, she has said so. The taking for granted that develops over the years is shed when she gets back having tasted something different and sees that what she has is better! Oh and did i mention, its also just plain FUN! Lets not underestimate that, analysis aside its fun for her playing around doing new things with new people, and its fun for me hearing about it.

Not sure I can add much to this, what do you think?

M

A review of Dystopian Longings

2010-09-28T23:34:00.002+01:00

Mistress Milliscent has recently published a book titled Dystopian Longings. I bought a copy to have a little late night read. I finished it the same night (damn the early morning after). Yes i rather enjoyed it!

Ok I admit I rather enjoyed it a lot. I may possibly have had my hand below the covers though you cant prove a thing! Thank god the iPhone can be used one handed. Naturally I didn't cum, neither my wife nor the dominant characters in the book would have approved :) It is for the most part extreme femdomme. How far could you take it, what would that look like, feel like. I found myself turned on sometimes and uncomfortable other times, it had me questioning how far I personally would want to go and where the line is drawn between consensual and non. Some was simply hot, but always edgy. Why am I enjoying this, would I really want to experience this? It makes you think.

I came to my own conclusions about how some of the themes relate to me. Have a read. You may get off on it, and it may even make you think. Be warned it's very kinky! You can get a copy here if you like.

We also got chatting and I ended up asking a few questions which I've shared below. Incidentally I've really enjoyed chatting, she is a very interesting and very friendly lady.

By the way, in case you are wondering, the emails from Dru are my favourite part of the book. She seems to relish her dominant position and her mean streak yet be loving with it. I hope Sandy never gets that dominant though! Scary.

Did you enjoy writing the book?

I had a marvelous time writing the book. It happened over the course of last winter and spring, for whatever reason I was very drawn to writing and I put down a great deal of material in a short period of time. Imagination overdrive is perhaps the only way I can explain it.

Additionally though, since the stories were not destined for the blog I was able to take plenty of time editing and perfecting them. That is a luxury denied me when blogging, in that format I must go straight from first draft to publishing due to time constraints.

Which is your favourite story, whats the appeal?

My favorite story in the collection is "Death On My Own Terms."

I certainly have no objection to porn for porn's sake, indeed I love great porn. I don't however look at my own writing in that way. I try to use my erotica to communicate truths fundamental to us as people. While my writing is extremely erotic, porn if you will, I think that behind it there is more.

Without a doubt that 'more' exists within "Death On My Own Terms." There is a huge debate right now within the United States over whether or not physician assisted suicide is moral, and if it should be legal. This issue is even larger in my home state of Washington as the voters have recently decided that yes, it is legal and yes, it is moral.

I agree with that view. I watched a family member die, very slowly, as doctors did everything they could to keep him alive for as long as possible despite the fact that he was in extreme pain and had no hope of recovery. It was a horrible death, and one he certainly did not want. There needed to be another way, but at that time, for him, no other way was allowed under our laws.

Our creator grants us the absolute right to use our bodies as we see fit without interference from the state provided that we do no harm to anyone else. This most certainly extends to the right to end our lives when we are ill, in pain, and have no chance of recovery. I believe that "Death On My Own Terms" communicates that fundamental truth well.

I also greatly enjoy the stories written as email messages from dominant wife to submissive husband. They are 'written' by Dru, and I adore her 'voice,' the happy way in which she communicates extreme desires to her husband.

If you had to live one of those lives, which would it be?

Due to the way I have structured my life, I get to live female domination in a way that very few people are ever able. Every single day is a femdom day at my house. As a result, I guess that I see a good deal of myself in each of the dominant characters in my stories.

If I had to choose though, I guess that I would most identify with Dru, the dominant character in the stories written as email messages. Like her, I love to laugh and smile while doing the most horrible things to those who choose to suffer under my heels.

Which famous person would you most want to have in your palm and what
would you do with them?

I was asked this question once before, many years ago. The specific person has changed, but my answer has not.

The President of the United States. Female domination is power exchange. The greater power a submissive possesses, the greater the exchange of power, and hence the excitement is. There would be no pleasure in dominating someone who possessed no personal gifts or personal power, pleasure comes from dominating someone who possesses wonderful qualities, gifts, successes, and chooses to become submissive.

As for what I would do with him, alas that is an unanswerable question. A great female dominated encounter or relationship comes about when both partners' interests are understood and those areas where they mesh are used to push the encounter or relationship forward. I don't think that excitement can be built within a dominatrix unless she understands her submissive and his desires, exploiting those for their mutual pleasure.

If you could sneak one real life individual in to live out one of your stories (think through the looking glass), would you do it, who, which etc?

Someone else has said that my stories take female domination to its logical and extreme conclusion. I think that is correct. If a relationship is pursued on a strictly female dominated basis, given enough
time, it could certainly end up in a place similar to what is described within the stories contained in Dystopian Longings.

Like Alice, through the looking glass, I would choose the story entitled "The Slave." It is, I think, the logical conclusion.

I don't know of a specific individual that I would pull into it, but I know his traits. He would adore me. He would adore the suffering he was forced to live through for me. He would respond to everything I did to him, I would witness his suffering with all of my senses. Lastly, he would obey, absolutely, everything, every time.

Does the senator look like you :)

In my minds eye she does not. She has longer hair. Perhaps our asses look the same though. The Senator has a world-class ass, and I've been told that my own is right there with the best of them.

The Senator and I do share an intense interest in politics, and a hatred for the hypocrisy displayed by members of the Religious Right.

Is there a sequel, can you tease us with it?

Book two will be out soon. Like Dystopian Longings it is a collection of flash fiction. I think that readers who enjoyed my first book will enjoy the second as well in that it is a continuation of the themes introduced before. Activities change from story to story, book to book, and ultimately the activities are that we as readers are after when engaged in late night, one handed reading.